Nomad: At last, my job is finally relevant again! Ace Detective Nomad is here, babyyyyy!
Montage of previous Not Detective jobs plays.
Special title card: Nomad, Ace Detective
Santa School
Nomad: Yes, yes! My time has finally come...
Hermes: Sup ace detective I've never heard of before!
Nomad: YOU SHUT UP
MC: well you're excited! / you really did want to be hired as a detective, huh? / (wow he really hasn't gotten any detective jobs)
(C) Nomad: STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT
Nomad: So I never got good enough paying detective jobs to live on until now. And now this job I've been hired for is just a drill and not a real case.
MC: Adulting is hard... / At least you're still hired as a detective! / It'll work out somehow
(B) Nomad: True
(C) Nomad: ...you kids have it so easy with nothing to worry about. Well it is a detective job, still.
Nomad: Gotta do what I got paid for and make some contacts in the police force.
MC: Pro! / Nice clothes! / I can't believe you got dressed up in new clothes for this
(B) Nomad: You think you're so slick don't y--well okay yeah I guess it is a shakeup from my regular clothes. Thanks, I got them for days like this.
(C) Nomad: I get to flex my detective skills! Got to look the part!
Nomad: God I really hope I don't burn these clothes. Anyway! We got the police to do the defense work, so...how about we start investigating for leads on the criminals? You said it's okay for us to catch them before anything happens, right?
MC: Yep / Ayo, Ace Detective! / I'll do my best!
(A) Nomad: Cool, let's start already.
(BC) Hermes: Hey Nomad, walk like one of those noir detectives!
Nomad: Shut up and go already.
Ded's office
White: The calling card? Oh yes, Hougen has it. We had a collaborator make it for us.
Hermes: Wow, going the extra mile there.
Nomad: ...can I borrow it?
White: Sure. I'll inform Hougen.
Nomad: Thank you. Alright, move out Watson and Whatshisface!
MC: Already? / Bye Ded
(B) White: Good luck!
Hallway
Nomad: Ded said the card wasn't delivered in advance of anything, right? That means whoever did it had to sneak in somehow. Did they hide or come in through a window?
Hermes: Wanna ask the old man for a blueprint or something?
Nomad: Hmm. Well I'm curious about how the defense is set up too. Gotta talk to Hougen about that, but later. You guys help me with some other stuff first.
MC: Okay! / Hermes, you're up / Say it like you're talking to a real assistant
---
(B) Nomad: You help too!
(C) Nomad: ...
Nomad: I need your guys' help with what's next. Please assist me my dear assistants.
Nomad: HAPPY NOW!?
---
Hermes: Cool, what do we do?
Nomad: First we're gonna question the students. Ask if they saw anything suspicious or out of the ordinary. Anything at all.
Hermes: 'kay.
Around the school
Guy A: We were all gathered in the morning for an assembly when the note came. Nothing out of the ordinary. Nobody said there was a broken window anywhere.
Wolf B: You guys aren't part of this school...I can tell with my nose even though you guys aren't in uniform or dressed like teachers! Oh! Is this a questioning? The police did this too. When we went back to the dorms we didn't see anything happen. And we haven't seen anyone weird between class time and after school.
Girl C: All we saw besides you guys is people we know from school. We're so busy getting ready for Christmas! The teachers are even busier. Oh, they went to the track and field grounds. Lots of people over there too.
Track and field grounds
A bunch of students are racing, throwing coal, stretching, and working out. Also a teacher in a tracksuit is doing some light running.
MC: The Black Santa students? / I wonder if Krampus is here? / Tanngrisnir why
Tanngrisnir: *(notices the party and jogs over)* Hello, hello MC! It's been such a long time! I heard from Ded that you're helping with our drill case.
Before MC can introduce Nomad and Hermes...
Tanngrisnir: Oh, wait MC! I'm acting on the same level of awareness the students are for this incident. More realistic acting or something. Apparently I'm terrible at keeping secrets. The students tell me they can tell even if I don't say anything.
MC: Yep.
Tanngrisnir: So I'm going to be doing the utmost to support my students. I just started joining the Black Santa students in their workouts and running. And of course, stew! You can have some too!
Nomad: Thanks. Wait how did we get to this point!?
Hermes: Free food!
MC: Hermes is poor too, huh / charity stew for two / wanna get another serving?
Nomad: Hey! Don't indirectly call me poor! I'm getting by even with all my bills!
Hermes: You got a detective's office right? Sounds nice to have a roof over your head.
Nomad: ...wait, you're homeless?
Hermes: No permanent residence. Plenty of places to sleep tho! Like under bridges, dead shops, back alleys, and tall grass by the river.
MC: That's worse than I thought / Missionaries, help! / How about I sneak you into our dorm?
(C) Hermes: Awesome! Don't worry I'll call beforehand.
Nomad: Don't just jump on that offer! Although your life does sound tough...
The party talks over stew and notices they've never talked about their individual origins.
Tanngrisnir: So you guys are in the middle of questioning? Does that mean you're going to talk to the Black Santa students too? Once you find the thieves it should be a sparring match between the students. They're getting very excited about punishing those naughty miscreants and...hm?
MC: Krampus! ...seems to be acting funny. Why is he breathing so hard?
Tanngrisnir runs over, followed by the party.
Krampus: Ha...ha...hahahahaHAHAHA!
Krampus: Come at me, thieves! I'll spank all of ya!
MC: WAIT WHAT / couldn't be me! / damn he laid out all these other guys
Guy A: Go Krampus!
Girl B: Yeah! Kick everyone who isn't part of the school's ass!
Wolf C: On that note please spar with us!
Nomad and Hermes: YOU WHAT
Tanngrisnir: Dear Odin, they've gotten too into the sparring and let the blood get to their head! This happens a lot!
MC: WHAT / Well Ded runs the school, that checks out / I'm in danger
Tanngrisnir: Careful, the four of them are top of their class! Aww man, if I didn't have a bum leg I'd love to join in on the sparring. Sorry it looks like we're doing this now. Don't worry, I'll stop things if it gets dangerous! I am now acting as Mister Referee! The wheel of fate is turning, fight! (rings gong)
Nomad: Why do you have a gong!? Ugh, no complaints about getting hurt!
MC: WHY / welp / no mercy!
Hermes: ha ha, let's have some fun
BATTLE START (more happens later)
Black Santas: YEAAAAHHH
Nomad: How are they so good at fighting!?
Hermes is dodging away. Nomad and MC are grouping together for defense.
Hermes: Okay bored now. (pulls out Totally Not Caduceus with the power of change and flow from the faith of Mercurius's alchemy)
Hermes: I cast Sleep! (fweeee)
Krampus: bruh (flops over with the other Santa students)
Hermes: I win!
MC: Was that your artifact? I have no idea what happened.
Hermes: I can't be bothered to explain the details, but I used my power to make them sleep. Nobody gets hurt, sparring match over. Right, Tanngrisnir or whoever?
Tanngrisnir: R-right. Game set!
Later
Santa Students: We're sorry we jumped you like that...
Krampus: I can't believe I didn't notice MC was here. And some other visitors saw me in Black Santa mode...I want to hit the quit button on life
Nomad: Eh, you guys are on edge from the case. I don't mind if we helped out as sparring partners.
Hermes: Same! It was p fun. Krampus, right? You acted like such a bad guy. Not bad!
Santa Students: YEAH
Hermes: Where'd you people come from!?
Guy A: The class star Krampus!
Wolf C: You're so kickass!
Girl B: Gap moe!
Krampus: come, sweet death!
Hermes: Ha ha, wow these guys like you so much
Krampus: ...y-yeah, it's embarrassing but nice to have people accept me acting like a villain.
Hermes: ...
Krampus: Black Santas terrorize bad children. I dreamed of being a hero, I never thought people would like me as someone villainous. I always thought I'd have to pick one or the other, but MC and some other people helped me out in an event, where I made friends and learned I could try to be the hero I wanted to be. A-and now I'm working with my teachers and classmates to be a Black Santa where I can be myself...
Mob Students: Yeah, we're with you Krampus!
Hermes: A way to be both, huh...?
Flashback
When Hermes came to Tokyo he saw how different its culture and customs were from Olympyus but thought it was much the same, so he tried to life a new life.
Native Cop: You're a famous thief and liar in your homeworld? Those are bad things here. Try to follow the law.
Nobody could tell Hermes was lying since Hermes was capable of lying and tricking Zeus, king of the world.
Native Cop: You again? You're what's wrong with society!
It should have been easy for Hermes to keep problems hidden since he could go around anywhere like a straw millionaire.
Native Cop: Why are we doing this again!? What, you're framed? Are you lying again? Fiiiine, I'll hear you out at least...
Hermes was a liar and a thief, so that was the unvarnished truth. Today he walks around carrying his past on his shoulders too...
Hermes: (Wherever we go, our roles follow us huh? Dammit.)
Hermes: Nice, Krampus!
Santa Students: RIGHT!?
MC: ... (something's wrong with Hermes)
Nomad: ... (I know that look in Hermes's eyes.)
End of Episode
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