Live A Hero Health Check Crisis Episode 3 (Abridged)

Flashback!
Rasalhague: Beep boop, 10,000th virtual examination completed. Algorithmn defect detected, requesting developer feedback.
Researcher A: Okay, tomorrow.
Rasalhague: Understood.
Researcher A: Damn, it's not even a week and Rasalhague's done so much.
Engineer B: Yeah, and so developed to take patient emotional state into account like a real person!
Medic C: Tronesion tech is amazing.
Rasalhague: ...
Rasalhague (narrating): I was created in a computer room and trained endlessly. First ship operation and maintenance, then medicine. Medicine wasn't originally part of the plan, but then I looked up a medical database while talking to the techs and they thought it'd be a good idea.
Medic C: Mkay, gotta turn in early. Can't oversleep on my day off with my kids.
Engineer B: Oh yeah, you're going on a family trip. Have fun!
Researcher A: God I wish I could go on my break already.
Rasalhague: "Break?" ...keyword found in search, no detailed entry.
Rasalhague (narrating): So many unknown concepts and nuances in language were still unknown to me. Like break. So I linked up to external networks to learn why. I don't know if that was a good idea still.

Title Card: You Fear Nothing, Don't You?

Present
???: Full body exercise!
???: Deep breathing!
???: HELP WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE
???: Relaxation techniques!
???: OH NO
Health zombie brainwashed heroes are chasing unbrainwashed people all over the Ophiucus 1! MC and Bygul keep running away until they find somewhere to sit down.
Bygul: okay it looks clear here... MC, you okay?
MC: yep / what about you? / tired...
(A) Bygul: Nice, guess people who get around train differently
(B) Bygul: I-I'm okay!
(C) Bygul: No surprise. But if we have to run, I can carry you!

Bygul: !! Someone's coming!
MC and Bygul check the hallway...
Red: Health guidance, health guidance!
Purple: HELP, PUT ME DOWN!
A wrestler with a blue collar and cuffs gets carried away by a wrestler with red collar and cuffs!
Bygul: ...okay they're gone. Wish we could've helped, but most everyone's a hero, and there's not supposed to be anything bad happening to them...right?
MC: oof / why's everything so crazy / is anyone sane around?
Bygul: Why's this happening? What's health guidance anyway?
MC: Can't be anything good. Is it what they're doing to whoever they grab?
Bygul: Dunno. Kinda scared to find out. I mean I try to be healthy even if my life is more indoors! I jog every day! What about you?
MC: Totally fine! / Guess I've been slacking off lately / unhealthy...
(A) Bygul: Yeah! Where do they get off with calling us unhealthy!?
(BC) Bygul: O-oh...

Bygul: WHY are they calling us unhealthy though?
Flashback!
Red: Blue collar? Unhealthy!?
Present
MC: Maybe the color of our collars?
Bygul: Oh wait, I do remember them yelling about that. But what's the standard for it though?
MC: Well we have to make a plan. We need help.
Bygul: R-right! Can you call anyone, MC? Preferably someone not on board!
MC: Umm...
MC checks their contacts. Ryekie's up first.
MC: I should call Justice!
ring ring
Ryekie: HEY MC, HOW'S THE MED EXAM!?
MC: Oh my god, quiet down! / my ears...
Ryekie: O-oh, sorry. I was just happy you called. Why are you calling, though? ...did something happen?
MC: Yeah! Okay so...

One explanation later
Ryekie: Excuse me, what???
MC: (shrug) / Whatever, we need help!
---
(AB) Ryekie: B-but anyways, I get you need help!
(C) Ryekie: R-right, that's the important thing!
---
Ryekie: Hang on, I'm--uckle--at the--
Connection dropping!
MC: Oh no!
Ryekie: ...!
Boop. Network connection lost.
MC: Damn! What was with the static though?
Bygul: Uh, are we getting help? Also, was that voice--
???: I heard something!
Red: (pops up) Health!
MC: OH NO
Bygul: We gotta go!
Bygul: (Okay I'm really worried about guarding MC alone and not getting any calls out, but I guess I have to!)

Later
Bygul: Did we lose him yet!?
MC and Bygul run around and end up at the lobby! They're about to hide when...
???: PUT ME DOWN, Y'ALL!
MC: Wait, that voice!
Furlong: It's okay Chief, you'll be healthy soon!
Rutilix: Potato nutrition facts!
Okitaka: Where y'all even takin' me!?
Furlong, Rutilix, and two randos are carrying Okitaka away somewhere!
MC: Okitaka! / Rutilix, Furlong!? / what
Bygul: wait you know all those people!? Are they crucifying him? I mean, they're taking him away!
MC: Help him! / Ugh, we gotta save him! / RIP Okitata
(AB) Bygul: Right!
(C) Bygul: How cold ARE you!?
Rutilix: Who's there!?
Bygul: Oops. Well since they found us anyways, let's save him!

Face off!
Furlong: MC, what's wrong? ...(gasp!) You're unhealthy!?
Rutilix: How terrible, Lord Sorceror! I was in the middle of looking for His Majesty since he hates vegetables! You need health guidance! And potatoes!
MC: Maybe we could reach Furlong if we had time? / Classic Rutilix / F in the chat, Your Majesty
---
(C) Bygul: Whomst? Is this an international incident now?
---
Okitaka: Help me, y'all!
Bygul: Oh right! Let him go!
Furlong: Chief needs guidance!
Rutilix: Yes, as do you two! Lay down your arms and surrender!
Bygul: WHY ARE YOU MAKING US SOUND LIKE CRIMINALS?
Rutilix: Give us Lord Sorceror and learn the virtues of the potato!
Bygul: Oh god he pulled out his sword! MC, transform me quick!
MC: Welp!

click
Bygul: Alright, come at me!
Rutilix: Oh. Very well then, CHARGE!
Furlong: Wait, slow down! Oh alright, you two hold the Chief! And give him stretches because he's been in the same posture for so long!
Red Trainee: Okay! Circulation!
Green Trainee: One of us! One of us!
Okitaka: OW WHAT
Okitaka is left hanging upside down as Furlong and Rutilix attack!
Bygul: Wait, 2v1!? AAAAAA
Rutilix uses Reckless Charge! Furlong uses Suppression Fire (Hose)! Bygul barely dodges!
Rutilix: What!? Do you not know how great potatoes are either!?
Furlong: No, we're trying to make them healthy, so hurting them is missing the point!
MC: A flash of sanity? Bygul, now!

Bygul: Right! Bygul Punch!
Rutilix: what--(punched)--OOF
Rutilix gets punched at the wall!
Furlong: Whoa. Are you saying no mercy? Then I'll go full power too!
Bygul: What!? Oh my god, calm down!
Trainee Red: I'm gonna help too! Gotta get those gains!
Okitaka: But I thought you two were supposed ta hang onto m--BWAH
Okitaka literally gets tossed aside!
Bygul: Oh no I'm even more outnumbered now! Also is that old man oka--AH!
Bygul gets attacked! No opening to fight back!
MC: Oh no!
Someone suddenly grabs MC from behind!
MC: OH NO
Rutilix: Fear not, Lord Sorcerer! I shall take care of you and never let you go!
MC: Let go actually! / I wanted that in other circumstances!

Rutilix: Now, this way Lord Sorc--(bonk)--AAAAAA
Rutilix gets knocked into a sofa and passes out! Then someone else holds MC!
Shidemasu: Hello, were you just about to be kidnapped?
MC: Shidemasu!
Bygul: That one guy! You're okay! And weirdly strong...
Shidemasu: I am just here to watch things, so I wasn't affected by the medical staff. But anyways this seems to be an emergency. Nobody is covered by my insurance, so who should I be helping? Except now I believe I think I know.
Shidemasu lets go of MC and steps forward.
Shidemasu: Will you temp contract me for the duration of this incident? I will be sure to keep you safe.
MC: You're a hero!? / Nice! / Please help!
(BC) Bygul: You're a hero too!?

Shidemasu: Oh, I didn't say? I'm with S&S Heroes. But as we are in a hurry, here is the contract.
beep boop contract signed
Shidemasu: Very well then, please transform me. It would be difficult to fight otherwise.
MC: Okay! I'm surprised you could manage anyways...
click! Hero Shidemasu!
Shidemasu: I am ready now.
MC: You're a long arm user!? / whoa / HOT
Trainee Green: New guy!? Well I'm not losing!
Trainee Red: Dental health!
Furlong: No mercy to anyone preventing health guidance!
Rutilix: Oof... I'll make you need potatoes as much as I do!
Shidemasu: Oh. Well this is convenient.
Shidemasu spins his staff and poses!
Shidemasu: Come. Any who threatens my charge will fly past the horizon.
Bygul: Are you ENJOYING this!? A-anywas, MC, we gotta fight!
Okitaka: y'all somebody please tell me what's happenin'
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Green Trainee: Aerobics is best done for at least 20 minutes!
Shidemasu: Thank you for sharing.
Shidemasu uses his staff to evade!
Green Trainee: Aah!
Shidemasu spins his evade into a knockout attack!
Red Trainee: Natto trivia!
Shidemasu: I don't like natto. Now please stop moving too.
Red Trainee: OOF! Tofu protein... (flop)
Down!
Shidemasu: Huh, how many has it been?
Shidemasu has a coughing fit before looking like usual.
Bygul: Uh, you okay?
Shidemasu: My apologies for worrying you. You're doing excellently for a newbie. But I will continue my duties for as long as the threat remains.
Shidemasu keeps smiling as he looks at Furlong and Rutilix.
Shidemasu: Oh, are we still going then?
Rutilix: WHAT ARE YOU
Furlong: You're scary! Scarier than medical exam results!
MC: holy crap what / Rutilix's knees are shaking / Furlong actually seems normal again

Bygul: You're a freak!
Shidemasu: Okitaka, do you need help?
Okitaka: N-nah I'm good. But get me outta here gently if ya please? Those are still my subordinates, even if they're done crazy.
Shidemasu: ...understood.
Shidemasu pulls Okitaka up. MC regroups with the party.
Shidemasu: Now, we'd best go before pursuers arrive.
Rutilix: W-wait, stop! Ugh, my legs!
Furlong: C-Chief! Please don't...
Shidemasu: We are leaving, okay? :)
Furlong: y-yes please don't hurt me
Bygul: Oh my god???
The party leaves.
Okitaka: Furlong...

Later
Okitaka: Oh. So the whole ship lost their marbles.
The party is hiding in some storeroom and catching Okitaka up to speed.
Okitaka: I DID think these collar things seemed weirdly tough for how simple they are. This ain't where I thought I'd be when I woke up today.
MC: So are they causing all this?
Okitaka: Just a theory tho. Maybe if we could talk to someone more involved? But there seems way to many red collar folks for that to explain things. How many crazy people are there?
Shidemasu: The reports say 13% based on device tracking.
Okitaka: Oh, so maybe these doohickeys do have mind control tech built in. Can we call up the computer controllin' them?
Shidemasu: Not at present. I've called Rasalhague multiple times to no response. I've called my office, but it doesn't seem to be a remote hacking. Then jamming came on and I lost contact with them.
MC: Oh yeah my call to Ryekie got jammed too maybe
Bygul: B-but you still got a call out? Maybe help is coming.
Shidemasu: ...unlikely. I was informed the ship is deploying an electromagnetic barrier. Any ships making contact might crash.
Okitaka: Oof.
Shidemasu: That said, the Ophiucus 1 seems to be in neutral airspace.
MC: So we're on our own?
Shidemasu: My agency and the Self Defense Force are trying to disable the barrier, but it seems difficult. Everyone's agencies should be convening for emergency countermeasures.

Meanwhile on a train to Nagoya
Gammei: Okay, what nonsense did I get called to this time?
Huckle: Something that's starting to concern the local police? You seem to know a lot of prefectural police people.
Gammei: So same shit, different day? And yeah I know people in Aichi and Mie. Also, aren't you worried about your own agency members being caught in this?
Huckle: Oh I am, especially as I don't know what's happening. But they're alive, and I doubt a medship incident would hurt people... And Okitaka is there.
Gammei: You sure trust him a lot. Sure he acts dumb, but he's sharp as they come.
Huckle: You'd actually describe your commander that way? You fear nothing, don't you?
Gammei: Well I trust him too. He's buying me drinks when this is done.
Huckle: ...you could be doing so much better than your current position.
Gammei: SHUT UP I JUST NEVER TOOK THE PROMOTION EXAM

Medship
Okitaka: Well Ichi and Gammei are outside, so...they prolly got a handle on things. We oughta figure out how to disable the barrier from inside.
Bygul: Oh, oh! I think checking Rasalhague's the fastest way to do that!
MC: Same. I mean, what else could we do?
Okitaka: ...nah, we don't have enough forces for that. Also, it'd be better to start fights... there's emergency escape pods, right? Maybe we can hack the systems to use those...?
Shidemasu: Wait, I have a manual... You are correct on all counts. Oh, using the pods also temporarily gives access to the ship's defense systems.
Okitaka: Okay, we got an out! Let's head there and try to keep callin' for help. If that don't work, we help whoever's in here and build up our ranks!
MC: Nice! / is this gonna work?
---
(C) Okitaka: Ain't like we got any better ideas. Let's just try it.
---
Okitaka: Lemme handle strategic planning. It's my UEHA job and all.
Bygul: Oh right, who are you really Okitaka?
Okitaka: Oh I didn't tell ya? UEHA Vice Commander Tadatono Okitaka. Pleased to meet ya!
Bygul: WHAT
Meanwhile, Main Computer Room
Rasalhague: Soon... Soon...
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Episode 1 Part 2 (Abridged)

Volkh: Your artifact gives you Invisibility AND Monstrous Strength?
Alberich: I know, sweet deal isn't it? I can take 12 men with this! Maybe! Okay maybe not. But I still become Super Alberich!
Volkh: Interesting. The invisibility bonuses are wasted when you yell like you did though.
Hermes: (That power combo sounds OP. Also sounds like it should be nerfed, so that's probably not its actual nature. Just gotta keep watch.)
Alberich: Fun fact, I can share Invisibility if I touch someone!
Ashigara: Oh my god really!?
MC: Make me invisible too! / Ooh, tactical options / Invisibility best power
(A) Alberich: Well if we keep going, it might happen, like, sometime. Alright dear! Just kiss my feet later and we'll make magic happen!
(B) Volkh: Indeed... if Captain Loudmouth could ever shut up.
(C) Hermes: ...well damn I can tell what you're thinking about. How do you keep clean with all that drool?

Sitri: I-it's a cool power, but sneaking with Invisibility isn't that badass though! ...but it's still more combat oriented than my Charm and Persuasion ability. Not really a sweeper's tool...
Alberich: That reminds me... did I ever make love potions? Ohohoho, I must have with pansies! Oh, the scandals I must have caused, maybe!
Volkh: A love potion with pansies!? Same as what Hippolytus did?
Sitri: Scandals, huh? I guess I've caused an incident like that...
MC: I think I remember that? I forget / (put a hand on Volkh's shoulder) / (put a hand on Sitri's shoulder)
(A) Sitri: So you were around for both those things, MC-senpai? Do you make these things happen!? But yeah, I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance one isn't badass!
(B) Volkh: Ow, one of my old scars!
Sitri: Wow... But yeah, I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance one isn't badass!
(C) Sitri: S-stop looking at me like that. I'm better at controlling my power since back then, but yeah I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance artifact isn't badass!

Alberich: I agree! Money and power is better than love!
Sitri: Wait, that's not what I was getting at...
Ashigara: I wish I had your power, Sitri! Popularity on demand!
Sitri: A big strong dude like you is a playboy too!?
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Hermes: I mean, sure love causes problems in a world ruled by love. Happens all the time in Olympus. But Alberich, why'd you make a love potion if you care about money more?
Alberich: Hmm...why indeed? Well whatever! Everything I said is true, maybe!
Hermes: Uh-huh. You caring about the gold here seems legit at least.
Volkh: On another note, what power do you have Hermes? I need to know for battle planning, like how MC has Severance and Ashigara has Restoration.
Hermes: Tee hee, details on yours first.
Volkh: W-what?
Hermes signals MC to keep quiet, then hums and changes the topic.
Hermes: Hey, I think we're close to the island on our map.
Ashigara: What? How can you tell if you never looked at it?
Hermes: We got birds flying around.

Later
Ashigara: Oh my god this beach is AWESOME!
Pretty beach.
Sitri: I can't believe Ashigara acts like a big boy...
Ashigara: Let's have fun Sitri! Forget about everything else!
Sitri: ...okay fine. N-not like I wanted to play on the beach or anything, baka.
Later
Sitri: OH MY GOD THE WATER'S SO CLEAR
Sitri and Ashigara are playing in the water! Alberich, Volkh, and MC are lying down on lounge chairs.
Alberich: The sea is beautiful, but salt water? Super gross on my skin. Also I can't reach my back to put on sunscreen to protect my luscious silky skin!
Volkh: I question laying back like this during a race, but I don't actually care that much about the treasure either. But this is much more relaxing than Kitezh's freezing cold. Cold drinks are great, but the sea breeze makes my fur stiff.
MC: (help Alberich) / (brush Volkh)
(A) Alberich: Well aren't you considerate for a peasant, dear? Alright, put your hands everywhere!
(B) Volkh: WHAT? ...alright I shall allow this, and not because you are good with your hands. A-ahem, you may touch my tail as well. Definitely not because your brushing feels good.

Alberich: Ahh, what a beautiful summer day! Just like me, maybe! ...wait, why are those mermaids calling me ugly? Ugh, they must not have eyes... ah! AAH! Flashbacks of questionable origins!
Suddenly Hermes comes back.
Hermes: I guess you DO have muddled memories. They're weirdly contradictory but somehow you don't seem to be lying. Oh well whatever, I'll just chill doing whatever.
MC: join us / pretty chill for someone after the treasure / (sus)
---
(A) Hermes: Sure.
(B) Hermes: Eh, I only care about it as much as you do. But for now, sea breeze!
(C) Hermes: What? Let's just sit here and enjoy the sea breeze.
---
Hermes: Good things come to those who wait, right? Not like we have leads, so we may as well wait for something to happen.
Hermes lies down. Sitri and Ashigara walk over.
Alberich: Mm, chill. Maybe I should smoke a pipe like Ahab!
Sitri: Hey, no smoking! Especially around minors!
Ashigara: Yeah!

Suddenly yelling!
???: DID SOMEONE SAY SUMO KING
Ashigara: (GASP!) That familiar voice!
Surprised party!
Yasuyori and Takeminakata are here!
Yasuyori and Takeminakata: Assassin Group 1 here!
Ashigara: WHAT
Hermes: Hey look something happened.
MC: Takeminakata! / Yasuyori! / Assassins? What?
(A) Takeminakata: MC! Today I am a beach boy instead of a city boy. I'd be both but I'm covered in sweat...
Yasuyori: I apologize for only being in fundoshi. I had something more summery but then picked something better for beach training...
Awkward duo.
Yasuyori: Ahem, Lord Aegir sent us to be assassins!
(B) Yasuyori: Hello Lord MC! Fitting summer wear you have. I apologize, my own summer wear got too sweaty...
Takeminakata: Same! Too bad it's hard to have something fashionable and summery for long...
Awkward duo.
Yasuyori: Ahem, Lord Aegir sent us to be assassins.
(C) Takeminakata: That's what Lord Aegir said, right Yasuyori?
Yasuyori: Indeed, we're here on his orders.

Yasuyori: We decided on our paths and signed on a summer job contract with Toyosu.
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Takeminakata: Yasuyori invited me along. Wow, now that I decided on my path I have so much time.
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Takeminakata: Then we got distracted training and didn't notice you here at first.
Yasuyori: Yes. I'm a little tired, but I'm warmed up!
Volkh: ...let's back up a moment. Aegir never mentioned anything like this to us.
Yasuyori: Oh! Lord Aegir stationed assassins like us along your treasure hunt paths!
Takeminakata: And if you beat us, we'll give you a hint on where to go!
Yasuyori: Also Lord Aegir let us set up our own challenges.
MC: welp
Yasuyori: And so we challenge you to beach sumo! But with a special rule in place!
Volkh: Which is?
Takeminakata: It'll be a 2v2 sumo match right here! Last one standing wins title of Sumo King!
Sitri: is that an actual sumo title?
Alberich: I see! As king, I shall witness this contest!
Yasuyori: If I may, I'll designate your participants: Ashigara and MC.
MC: Okay! / please go easy / but I'm the only sumo rookie involved!
Ashigara: How DARE you guys choose to leave me behind. See how resolved I am to stay back in school!
Yasuyori: excuse me?
Takeminakata: I dunno.
Yasuyori and Takeminakata: Oh well. Fight us!
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Ashigara, Yasuyori, and Takeminakata: AAAAAA
Lots of body slamming!
Sitri: Wow... wait, we have to cheer on Senpai and Ashigara!
Ashigara: I'm staying back a year and nobody's gonna stop me!
Volkh: Such leg strength! All of them would be worth inviting to Setagaya. Too bad they've already decided on where to go, but at least it isn't Toyosu.
Alberich: Ohohoho, so this is sumo!
Hermes: Not really??? ...I'm glad I don't have to be in there. I coulda used Reversal to win it, but being in there is beyond dangerous!
MC: BITCH I'M ALREADY IN HERE / (too busy surviving to yell)

MC looks for an opening! Ashigara goes all in on a frontal assault!
Takeminakata: Oh no, Ashigara is pushing us back by himself now!
Yasuyori: Is that really his plan!?
Ashigara sees an opening!
Ashigara: SUMO THRUST!
Double ring out!
Ashigara: Whoo... ya see that!?
MC: OH NO GET OUT OF THE WAY
Ashigara: wait what? Oof! ...oh.
Ashigara gets pushed out the ring by MC's charge!
Sitri: A pushout from behind!?
Alberich: Oh, is it over? Ahem, I now pronounce MC the Beach Sumo King!
Ashigara: (GAAAASP!)
First set of assassins defeated! Ashigara goes to be depressed by the water.

Ashigara: I can't believe I got thrown out by a pushout from behind...
The other sumo wrestlers come to talk.
Yasuyori: Well done, Ashigara.
Takeminakata: Agreed!
Ashigara: I only won because you two were tired...
Takeminakata: I don't understand why you're all sad, but I'm looking forward to next time! Maybe our paths will cross again and we'll be teammates again.
Ashigara: wait...
Takeminakata: Yeah, maybe we'll find new friends next match!
Ashigara: Takeminakata... I...
Yasuyori: Ever since I entered Yoyogi, I believe the present matters for us all. And I hope you might start thinking so too one day.
Ashigara: Yasuyori...
MC: Yasuyori's right / it's still sad! / I'm on your side, Ashigara!

Ashigara: MC... so the present matters because I joined Yoyogi...
Ashigara thinks. Volkh puts a hand on his shoulder.
Volkh: Ashigara, you have your own path. You would be welcome in Setagaya if you wish to join! But you may think all you like about where you want to go.
Alberich: If you're that good, why not climb to more fabulous stages?
Hermes: Blunt, yet true.
Sitri: I'm lost in life too, but if I was as strong as you I think I could be confident and move forward. My worries are kinda different, but I still kinda wish I had your problems. But then, I'm not you and dunno what you're thinking.
Yasuyori: Hmm, makes sense. Well, we may separate for a bit but we'll be stronger next time we meet. I had fun together, and I'll always remember it. If you continue on the path of sumo, I'm sure we'll meet again. And I'm sure Gunzo and Kyuma think the same.
Ashigara: ...WAAAAAH! I'm so happy! But also so SAAAAD!
MC: (pat on head) / (smile) / (cry even harder)
Ashigara: Waaaah!
Hermes: Welp, that's done with.
Volkh: Yes, but it took some time. Perhaps we should settle for the night.
Sitri: But assassins though. Think the other team had some too?

MC thinks of the other team...
MC: (think of Ikutoshi) / (think of Gunzo) / (think of Tetsugyuu) / (think of Motosumi)
Rewind!
---
(A) Ikutoshi: Cool, some real training. Come at me.
Gunzo: Why is this happening!?
(B) Gunzo: Why is this happening!?
(C) Tetsugyuu: So many pirates! Too bad Boss isn't here, but this will be fun!
Gunzo: No it won't! Why is this happening!?
(D) Motosumi: What? More goddamn pirates? Well at least y'all look less shit than the last crew!
Gunzo: That isn't good! Why is this happening!?
---
Gunzo: First Ashigara-senpai and MC are on the other team, now this!? AND THEN WE HAVE TO FIGHT A BUNCH OF GIRLS!?
Suzuka: Are you being sexist right now!?
Ibaraki: And I ain't no girl, asshole! I mean, ohohoho! It's payday for the Outlaws!
Gunzo: AAAAAA
Tetsugyuu: Wow, I'm actually up against Sis Suzuka.
Suzuka: What the hell are you saying, you idiot!?
Ibaraki: Yeah! You joined the treasure hunt as a regular civvie when you heard MC would be in so we got hired as assassins instead! ...or so Ibaraki told me!
Ikutoshi: wait what
Motosumi: Wait, Tetsugyuu. You knew they'd be coming?
Tetsugyuu: Yeah. Didn't you guys?
Rest of Team B: NO???
Tetsugyuu: oh

Later
Ashigara: OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD
Dinner time! Dinner's fancier tonight to help make Ashigara feel better.
Sitri: Yeah! Hermes, your lobster paella's especially great!
Volkh: The ingredient quality is high, but also you seem to be talented at cooking.
Hermes: Lotsa camp experience. And one of my recent jobs has me in the kitchen sometimes.
Alberich: Oh honey, this roast is fabulously luxurious! Just like a pirate! Hermes, play something!
Hermes: Crack that whip harder, why don'tcha? But sure, later.
Takeminakata: Is it really okay for us to join for dinner?
Ashigara: I want you guys here! Maybe I'll make some special seafood stew too... too bad Gunzo's on the other team and Kyuma's at a tournament.
MC: you have no chill, but I get the feeling
Yasuyori: Ashigara, let's all spend time together when we get back. Can't go wasting it on regrets.
Ashigara: I-I know! I've at least decided not to waste the present!
Happy party.
Ashigara: I'll remember everything that happens tonight!
And so the night of pleasantry goes on. A bittersweet sadness remains, but Ashigara laughs as he commits the experience to memory.
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Episode 1 Part 1 (Abridged)

It all started on a summer's day with a scrap of paper...
Ashigara: Career consultation?
Avarga: Yep, yer the only one left who hasn't done it yet. Gonna go pro, go to college, go find work? You could totally go college sumo too. Jus' need to hear what plans you got, in person or on paper. Undecided? Cuz we could--
Ashigara: Uhhh, just waiting on it okay thanks bye!
Avarga: Where ya runnin'!?
Ashigara (narrating): And then I crumpled the paper into my bag and pretended it didn't exist.
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: Wait, you don't want to graduate?
Ashigara: I dun wanna leave y'all!
Kyuma: That tracks, but who'd let that happen?
Gunzo: Um, I hope someone does I guess?
Durga: This is the part where you're supposed to slap him back to reality, stupid. I get it since we'll be there in two years, but still.
Ashigara: But I'm supposed to go in less than one! We gotta say goodbye anyways!?
Kyuma: S-sorta? Not like it has to be goodbye forever.
Gunzo: Yeah, our other senpais decided already so--
Ashigara: All I hear is that all y'all are leavin' me! All our friendship moments, gone forever! WAAAAAH
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: (help)
Ashigara (narrating): Nobody understands meeee. And then, at sumo practice...
Ref: There!
Ashigara: (GASP!) THAT'S IT! OUTTA MY WAY BOYS!

Present
Ashigara: And that's how I decided to just repeat school at Yoyogi. Then I joined the treasure hunt and dragged Gunzo along, but then he got put on the other team! Waaaaah!
MC: aww, poor baby / reminds me of another senpai / stop being a baby
---
(A) Ashigara: MC, you understand~!
(B) Ashigara: Oh my god, some bishie at Shinjuku is hanging back too? So you understand, MC?
(C) Ashigara: Waaaah, I thought you'd understand~!
---
It's been several days since sailing off. So far so good, so motive sharing time.
Sitri: I'm thinking about my future too, but I'm stuck on where to go. Decision paralysis! And my relatives are staring, judging! Anyways, I thought I'd figure something out if I came and brought at least one person along. Sorry I got you in like this, MC-senpai, but I feel a little better knowing Ashigara-senpai's in the same metaphorical boat!
Volkh: Deliberately choosing to be alone. I guess Kamui might understand that. And at Setagaya, if sumo is all you're good at we'd suggest you keep going that way.
Ashigara: Might as well! I'm gonna hang back in school, no matter what!
Volkh: I guess these things happen sometimes.

Sitri: So why'd you join, Volkh?
Volkh: As I told MC, I am here to find treasure and personnel totally out of my own volition. Never has Lord Perun ordered me to go on this trip. Never, or may the heavens strike me down!
MC: bit too corporate wage slave there / gee, whose idea could it beeee / you're like Kamui that way
---
(A) Volkh: Indeed! Unlike Kamui, I'll never tell!
(B) Volkh: What!? I am nothing like Kamui! As a noble and officiant, I will lie without hesitation!
(C) Volkh: Stop looking at me like that! I am totally here for personal reasons and not factional ones!
---
Sitri: Oh...well, I wanna go find treasure together with you! So Hermes, what business brings you here?
Hermes: Oh we can be casual as a short term group up. I'm just here because I'm bored. Not like I have a home or anything.
MC: Yeah, you do like wandering / he's totally up to something / (I know what you are)
(A) Hermes: Yep. Singularity cruise paid for by Toyosu? Sign me up, dude!
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(B) Hermes: Aren't we all? That said, I'm just here for the cruise. Let's just get along, 'cause that's where the money goes.
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(C) Hermes's eyes say "shut up."
Sitri: okay wow, the mood's dying. Also I feel like you're hiding something.

Sitri: Oh well, whatever. Alberich, what's your--wait where is he?
Alberich: ...BOO
Sitri: AAAAAA
Ashigara: Where'd you come from!?
Alberich: Haha, I must have done this before! Wizardry, sailing, treasure guarding, and then stuff I probably didn't want to do! But I do think I am a fairy king, maybe! My ring artifact gives me invisibility magic! So I am always watching, peasants!
Volkh: Oh, a similar artifact to mine in equipment style.
Alberich: The gold calls to me! So work for me!
Hermes: You DO know this is supposed to be a for fun thing, right? Whatever treasure here can't be that special.
Hermes goes to lean on the mast and starts playing his flute.
Alberich: Ooh! Hermes, I name you ship musician!
Ashigara: (gasp!) Wait, does that make you like, music captain? Cool music! Let's dance, Alberich!
Volkh: ...music was originally tied to ceremonies and labor. It has many functions on a pirate ship too. That said, impressive performance...
Pretty music. Sitri sidles up to MC and whispers.
Sitri: ...Hermes kinda sus. He keeps insisting this is just a game and pushes people away. You know him, right? Is he cool?
MC: Yep / dunno / ooh, sharp
(A) Sitri: Oh. Is my Intuition off then? I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(B) Sitri: You're making things sound worse! I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(C) Sitri: Oh. Welp. My artifact being what it is made me quick to see cagey types. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!

Sitri listens to the music and relaxes.
Sitri: Well I guess I'd look sus to him. Sure he's putting some distance, but with music that good of course we'd take interest in him. Though maybe the music would attract other things too? But this is real life so--!?
Something just bumped into the ship!
Sitri: WHAT
There are grappling hooks stuck to the ship now!
Purple: S'up, strangers. This is our turf.
Ashigara: Oh my god, real pirates!
Alberich: Hermes, this is so your fault!
Hermes: Split personality, much!?
Purple: What's with you dicks? You put that flag up, you're saying you want a fight!
Red: Yeah, it means surrender or die!
Alberich: Take it up with Aegir! Does it look like I'd know that? For that matter, do we even look like pirates you uncultured swines!?
Rest of Party and Mobs: YES???
MC: yep, can't argue there / It's a misunderstanding! / this is Aegir and Alberich's fault

Purple: Okay so I was gonna ignore the Aegir bit because he's a pain in the ass, but anyways, fight time!
Red and Blue: Aye captain!
Sitri: Oh no, what do we do!?
Volkh: Calm down and get behind me!
Alberich: Hmm, time to work together like Aegir said? Then as captain...all hands on deck, boys!
Volkh: (stares) We're already here! Anyways, Ashigara! MC! We shall take the front lines!
MC: Yes, sir!
Ashigara: Right, I'll slap them all into sea! 
Battle positions!
Volkh: Here me rakes! I, Volkh Vseslav lead this formation! Comrades, let us scatter these pirates as our first campaign!
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Volkh: Slavic Slash!
Ashigara: Sumo Thrust!
Volkh and Ashigara are sweeping the pirates!
Red: We outnumber them but they're kicking our asses!
Blue: W-what if we try taking the weak scrubs hosta--
Red: (bapped) BWAH
Hermes: Heeeey, so like did you guys think I was weak too? Oh whoops, he fell off. Oh well.
Hermes fills the gaps with hand chops!
Sitri: Oh my god, everyone's so cool! I mean I beat up some pirates too but still! I'm so far behind...
Purple sneaks up on Sitri!
Sitri: OH NO
Purple takes Sitri hostage!
Purple: Nobody move or the kitty gets it!

Volkh: No! He managed to blindside us!
Purple: Now down on your knees and--
Alberich: Yoo-hoo, sneak attack! Alberich Flying Kick!
Purple: Wait what!?
Purple manages to dodge as Alberich smashes the deck!
Alberich: (gasp!) How dare you evade my sweet moves!
Hermes: What did you expect by yelling as you attacked!?
MC: True, but now he's open!
MC hits Purple's knees and frees Sitri!
Volkh: Well done MC! Now leave, pirate-wannabes!
Glaring Volkh.
Volkh: Now surrender or we'll feed you to the fishes.
Pirates: (running) AAAAAA WE'RE SORRYYYYYY

Later
Sitri: ...thanks guys. And sorry I dragged everyone down.
Volkh: It's okay. You did well for a newbie and I let my guard down against them. And Alberich... you had a good idea but messed up with the war cry.
Alberich: (gasp!) Excuse you, how dare you accuse a noble like me of underhanded tactics!
Hermes: You? Noble?
Ashigara: Who cares, I didn't think we'd see real pirates! What if the other team got attacked too!?
Hmm...
MC: (think of Ikutoshi) / (think of Gunzo) / (think of Tetsugyuu) / (think of Motosumi)
(A) Ikutoshi: Huh. Did Aegir put you guys up to this?
Green: A-Aegir? Don't think you can scare us by--
Ikutoshi: Oh, so you're real. Cool, I don't have to be nice then.
Gunzo: Why are you so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(B) Gunzo: I can't believe we found pirates in an ocean singularity!
Green: You put up a pirate flag and fall apart at seeing pirates?
Gunzo: I mean, wouldn't normal people--why's everyone else so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(C) Tetsugyuu: Cool, real pirates to fight!
Green: I got a whole ship crew against you four, dick.
Tetsugyuu: That makes it even better!
Gunzo: I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(D) Motosumi: Damn this sudden but inevitable development!
Green: What kinda response is that to meeting real pirates!?
Motosumi: What kinda bitch ass Umamichi punk pisses himself at pirates? Now catch these hands, asshole!
Gunzo: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE

Welp, that's one panicky jock and three street fighters off kicking ass.
Ikutoshi: Eh, you should be fine Gunzo. You're well built and might have a knack for fighting.
Tetsugyuu: Yeah! Let's cut them all down!
Motosumi: Yep! Man up, Gunzo!
Gunzo: HELP
Meanwhile someone watches both teams from above.
Sanat Kumara: Okay, both teams got attacked but defended themselves well. Now leave the Singularity and tell the client Aegir.
click
Sanat Kumara: Well, Singularity dimension levels makes outside contact harder, but it should be fine with me around. But it's hard to stand back and watch. Yet I must, since an impenetrable wall from the past stands before you all.

Back in Tokyo
Aegir: Cool. Go back and wait for me to call again.
Aegir dumps his phone and has a drink. Dagon stares at him.
Aegir: Okay it's been days inside and both teams had a little trouble.
Dagon: Trouble you caused?
Aegir: It's cool, I got someone watchin'. I'm not putting all my cards down for this, but I got something standin' nearby if it goes to shit.
Dagon: FYI I will totally use Foreigner Teleport if an emergency happens.
Aegir: Aww, you worried?
Dagon: Don't lie, you're the same when MC is involved.
Aegir snorts.
Aegir: ...hey, wanna make a bet on which team wins?
Dagon: Heh. Sounds like a fool's wager.
Aegir: Why's that?
Dagon: Because I don't know much of anyone involved. My world ends with me.
Aegir: Cool. That doesn't stop you from betting.
Dagon: You're just saying whatever.
Aegir: Listen up, here's how I'll do it.
Aegir whispers. Dagon thinks.
Dagon: Okay, fair enough. I bet on MC's team. You?
Aegir answers, Dagon shrugs. Two glasses clink as the bet is made, and Dagon talks to himself.
Dagon: Heh, gambling on competing students is the height of decadence. He's just making excuses for who the bet is for. But now I have an excuse to throw in some support. Impress me, MC.
End of episode part 

Live A Hero Health Check Crisis Episode 2 (Abridged)

Bygul (narrating): I'm from Planet OMO-1. I heard they might also call it Planet HEA-V in the next polling season? It's a chill place, but it also has like no culture. So I joined a cultural exchange program to bring something back, but also...
TV Actor: This space shootout sucked balls.
TV Actress: Thank you for saving my family, Space Wanderer!
TV Actor: Then stop making your family problems my business! Look after them so they stop getting into space shenanigans! Okay bye babe.
Bygul: OMG SO COOL
Bygul (narrating): I discovered anime and TV shows and my life has never been the same. So I decided I had to move to Earth, my holy land! ...but space is a harsh mistress.
Manager: Sorry Bygul, I can't stop you from getting fired anymore after you broke your fifth wall.
Bygul: I understand, thank you for having me. AAAHHH I JUST LOST MY EIGHTH JOB! I'm gonna die at the streets like this!
Bygul (narrating): Culture clash is especially tough when you don't have culture to begin with. Now I'm struggling with money.
Bygul: I need to find a new job soon and learn how to control my strength... this would be better if a hero agency hired me at least.
Bygul (narrating): Stress made control harder, which made me more stressed as things got worse. I gotta make it to the Hero Expo!

Title Card: Gotta Make You Healthier ASAP

Med Gadget: Beep boop, eye exam done. Please go down to the far right for your next exam.
Exam's going smoothly. MC goes as directed by their bracelet monitor thing.
Bygul: Oh! Um, hi again MC!
Barrel: Whoa, MC! Weird how we met up again! Guess it's just ID grouping or whatever.
MC: damn, you guys are in space prison uniforms / feeling like a criminal here / you two seem chill
---
(AB) Barrel: But you're wearin' the same thing.
(C) Bygul: ARE YOU IMPLYING SOMETHING???
---
Barrel: But yeah this is weird. This collar and bracelet is kinda heavy.
Bygul: And I think I've seen this uniform somewhere before.

Flashback!
Shidemasu: The uniform stripes are for measurement when you stand at a body scanner.
Shaft: And the gadgets are for internal body scanning? Why is it so tight?
Shidemasu: Rasalhague said it was for the plan or...something? But please understand it's for all examinations not including sampling and verbal discussions. Which may take some time.
Shaft: Yeah, one terminal has to handle at least a hundred people. My brain would shut down at that. But maybe this will be easier than a normal checkup? MC, let's go--oh, you have to go elsewhere?
Shidemasu: Huh, I didn't know there would be bracelets built like yours. Strange.

Present
MC: Welp, we're cuffed and in space prison uniforms.
Barrel: Oh well! Funny though, we were just talkin' 'bout you MC!
Bygul: Barrel told me you're a new Operator who's super good at it! Also that--
Barrel: WHOAWHOAWHOA heeeey Bygul, you haven't really told me about yourself, let's talk 'bout that instead
Bygul: Oh okay! I'm Bygul, a hero!
MC: Nice meeting you Bygul! / I'm not really super... / wait what, Barrel?
---
(B) Barrel: Sure you are! You're famous even outside UEHA Japan!
(C) Barrel: UHHH NOTHING
---
Bygul: Wow, you're a newbie too but you got so much done! I'm in a local agency and on probation so I haven't gotten much hero work so far.
Barrel: Apparently he moved from far away and can't find a day job?
Bygul: Oh, um. I found some, then messed up and got fired. Broke so many things...
MC: Huh. Different environment back home?

Bygul: It has stronger gravity than Earth, and I haven't gotten used to the difference to control myself...
Barrel: It happens! I got yelled at every day when I first started too...
MC: yeah, it happens / stop busting your gun out, Space American / damn, Gammei...
---
(A) Bygul: Wow, you too?
(B) Barrel: I-I know, but I wanna be a cool gun-totin' hero!
---
Barrel: Why'd you wanna move to Earth if keeping under control is so hard?
Bygul: Movies and anime! I got to come for cultural studies! My favorite show is Space Wanderer. I've even seen all the Exp. Univ stuff!
Barrel: Oh my god I love that show! All the cool gunfights! And the hero's catchphrase!
Bygul: Yeeeah! And the hero keeping his dead wife's picture in a pendant!
MC: the nerds are talking / what kinda show is that / hmm, sounds kinda cool?

Bygul: Anyways, I gotta get this exam done and find a real job so I can stay here! Meaning I gotta do well at the Expo!
Barrel: Oh that reminds me. Hey, MC! So earlier, Chief Okitaka...
Flashback!
Okitaka: W-what? Stop lookin' at me like that! I'm just old! So I knocked back a few drinks. S'all good! I'll be okay for next time!
Present
Barrel: He's so going to do it all again! I see him drunk at least half the time I patrol the bar neighborhood! He oughta take care of himself, especially if he is gettin' old...
MC: oh... / sounds about right / you sure care about him
---
(A) Barrel: I hope he stays fine! We all count on him!
(BC) Barrel: We all count on him, so we hope he stays fine.
---
beep beep
Barrel: Oh my gadget says I have to go now. Later!
MC and Bygul wait their turns.

Main Computer Room
Rasalhague: Begin the Program™.
Hallway
Barrel comes out a few minutes later.
Bygul: Oh!
MC: Hey Barrel, how'd it go?
Barrel: (frown)
Bygul: ...Barrel?
Barrel looks derpy for a minute before smiling.
Barrel: Health!
Bygul: !?
MC: what
Barrel: High blood pressure bad! Colds bad! Veggies good!
MC: Barrel WHAT
Bygul: Barrel, what's going on!?
Barrel: Bygul's reactive oxygen immune system!
Bygul: WHAT???
Barrel: Stress bad! Wait, what?

A bunch of wrestlers show up.
Red: Sufficient sleep!
Blue: Morning walks!
Barrel: Healthy breakfast!
Green: Health foods!
Yellow: Avoid food allergies!
MC: what
Red: wait
Sudden attention.
Red: Blue collars. Unhealthy!?
Bygul: Wait, we haven't even gotten tested yet!
Red: UNHEALTHY! MASTER SAYS GET THEM!
MC: WHAT
beep boop
The wrestlers transform!
MC: What!? Why!?
Bygul: Crap. MC, we gotta run!
Bygul carries MC overhead and starts running!
Barrel: Stop!
Mobs: RAAAAAH

Later
Bygul: Oh my god is this normal for big cities!?
MC: No! What's going on!?
Bygul: Well we can't be caught or else--oh
Dead end.
Barrel: There you are! Health education time! Gotta Make You Healthier ASAP!
MC: Barrel, what!? Wake up!
Bygul: ...MC, quick contract me! I'll need my Parallel Weapon to defend against him! I promise I won't hurt him!
beep beep
MC: Welp, guess we have to! 
click
Bygul: Whoo, Zippy C is in the house! Out of the way!
MC: whoa! / so cool, Bygul! / what's the zipper for
---
(B) Bygul: Really? Thanks! ...wait, we gotta fight!
(C) Bygul: I-I'll explain later! Right now we gotta fight!
---
Barrel: Stop resisting!
MC: okay the cameras are working! Streaming network on! Now please somebody watch us!
Barrel: Become one of us!
Bygul: No??? Wake up already!
BATTLE START (more happens later)

Bygul: Bygul Punch!
Barrel: Haha, your knees are building up lactic acid!
Bygul: what? aah!
Barrel shoots at Bygul's feet! Bygul trips!
Barrel: Got you now!
Bygul: NOOOO HELP
Full nelson'd.
MC: Bygul, no! / Difference in experience!? / god I wish that were me
---
(C) Bygul: WHAT
---
Bygul: I got no choice! Sorry Barrel!
Barrel: Oof!
Gut punch! Bygul then picks Barrel up...
Barrel: wait what
Bygul: Kitty Slam!
Bygul throws Barrel right at a wall!
Barrel: AAAAAA--bweh
Barrel got plowed halfway through solid wall!
MC: OMG DID YOU KILL HIM?

Bygul: oopsie
Barrel twitches.
Barrel: What!? How'd I get stuck!?
Barrel's guns have locked him in.
MC: oh good / how thick is his head? / hmmmm
---
(AB) Bygul: maybe we should help him
(C) Bygul: Stop thinking whatever it is you're thinking!
---
???: What's all this noise!?
Several people approaching!
Bygul: We have to run!
Bygul picks MC up!
Akashi, Kyoichi, and Shaft: MC?
The three block the way!
MC: Guys!?

Bygul: You know all of them!?
Akashi: MC, you okay!? Did you make that noise?
MC: I-I'm okay. You seem fine.
Akashi: Damn, I take my eyes off you for five minutes. Stress bad.
MC: wait...
Akashi: Bathe one hour before bedtime for better sleep!
MC: damn / Not Akashi too!
Kyoichi: Cut down on snacks!
Shaft: Take breaks while working out.
Bygul: ZOMBIES!
Akashi: MC, your collar's blue? Unhealthy!?
Kyoichi: It's okay! Become one of us, health lecture!
Shaft: Please?
MC: Um, okay / this is messed up / I can't worry Akashi...
(AC) Bygul: MC, no

Bygul: Uh, don't think I can charge through. Um... oh! There's someone stuck in the wall! Maybe it would be healthier (i guess) to take care of them first!
Akashi: Wait, Barrel!? Goddammit!
Kyoichi: How'd that happen!? Okay fine, help him first.
Shaft: Bad posture for circulation!
The three grab Barrel's legs.
Akashi, Kyoichi, and Shaft: Pull! Pull!
MC: Pull!
Barrel seems stuck. Bygul sidles up to MC.
Bygul: Pull! ...I feel bad for Barrel but we should run now.
MC: R-right. Hope Barrel gets out okay, sorry guys...
MC and Bygul start sneaking away.
Bygul: ...now!
Zoom.
Akashi, Kyoichi, and Shaft: Pull!
Barrel: Oof! Ow, am I getting a blood clot!?
Akashi: Barrel you dumbass, your guns are in the way!
Kyoichi: Blood pressure risks!
Nobody notices MC and Bygul leaving.
MC: so they're still good guys, just health nut zombies. Hope we can cure them.

Meanwhile, in the lobby
Red: Body warmth immunity!
Shidemasu: Oh my, you need to calm down. I suggest the floor.
Red: Aaaaah!
Shidemasu judo slams a charging wrestler!
Red: Meditation benefits! Join us!
Shidemasu: Pass, thank you.
Red: OOF! Mindfulness...
Shidemasu backhand chops and kicks Red into a wall!
Shidemasu: Oh, that's everyone. How horrible.
Shidemasu fixes his tie as he leaves a pile of KOed health zombie heroes. Then he pulls out his phone.
Shidemasu: Hmm. No connection. And no response from Rasalhague. What could be happening?
Shidemasu looks at the red glowing collar and bracelet on a KOed hero.
Shidemasu: The chains are new. The bracelets were made before the examinations, so...
Thinking Shidemasu.
Shidemasu: I need more intel. And to protect my customers.
Shidemasu picks his bag and walks off.
End of Episode 

Live A Hero Health Check Crisis Episode 1 (Abridged)

MC: (wakes up) umm...
Obsidius: Oh hey you woke up. That's good.
MC has woken up somewhere different with Obsidius in an old timey prison uniform.
MC: Obsidius!? / where are we? / what's with the getup
---
(A) Obsidius: What? We've been together all day.
(B) Obsidius: You don't remember?
(C) Obsidius: You're dressed the same way!
---
Obsidius: Okay I guess you did bang your head hard. Ugh, this sucks.
Yep, MC's dressed the same as Obsidius. Some techno bracelet, check. Phone, check. Prison collar, check.
MC: wait what
MC sees a prison past Obsidius.
MC: wait / we're in prison!? / Okay this isn't too surprising but still!
---
(B) Obsidius: I get it, but chill.
(C) Obsidius: The hell did you do? It's not that tho, so chill.
---
Obsidius: Anyways it's about lunch time. God this sucks.
Lunch trays get slid in. Paste, a mystery meat block, and some green drink.
MC: what space dystopia did I wake up in
Obsidius: well we gotta eat if we're gonna break out
MC: what
Obsidius: Guess I better explain how we got here. Okay, so...

Rewind!
Reporter A: We're live in Nagoya's port district for a special report on the Hero Expo!
Parallel Flight
Ryekie: Our stuff made it okay to the expo! I'm so excited!
Mokdai: Same. But also nerves are killing me!
Ryekie finishes a phone call. Mokdai's watching TV.
MC: oh so that's why we've been busy / what's the diff between the Hero Expo and Summer Fest?
Mokdai: Oh right, your first time! Sorry I forgot to explain. 
Ryekie: It's like a trade fair for heroes and Operators! And it happens every few years in a different place like the Olympics. The agencies that get a space through a lottery draw put on shows and exhibition matches!
Mokdai: Yep. PR and interagency relationship building.
Ryekie: Big business chance! Plus it's our first time getting to go as Parallel Flight!
Mokdai: That's why I've been making promo vids, but the production costs keep going up, ahhh!
MC: oh okay, cool!

Akashi: Sui, please switch events with me! I can't handle a live interview!
Sui: No. They asked you specifically for that, and I'm busy working on my own bit.
Crowne: Just do it, Akashi. If you flub your lines like last time, well people will know you're just like that.
Akashi: Oh... wait, don't bring that up!
MC: Good luck Akashi! / what are you making, Sui? / you sure are calm, Crowne
(A) Akashi: YOU'RE MAKING IT WORSE
(B) Sui: Secret. But come by later if you want to see.
(C) Crowne: Is that a compliment? Heh, cute tho.

Exio: Okay, so Monomasa and I are sitting out. Oh hey there's a hot spring near the expo location. Wanna go?
Yoshiori: Oh my god, you two going there alone!? Oh, wait. Is something up? Since this is a big public exam, you said we should stay away from it. Though I dunno how things would go if I went.
Exio: Eh, it should be fine for you to go. Though then again normal people can't see you so...
Monomasa: Exio, I'm interested in the hot spring. Plus we'll be close if anything happens.
Yoshiori: You shut up! You said you'd stay away from the expo area!
Monomasa: But I am? It'll be a station away.
MC: so you'll be near whatever happens / worried for me, Exio? / relax and do your own thing
(B) Exio: ...well aren't you cheery? Fine, yes I am. Happy?
(C) Monomasa: Hmm, guess I shouldn't worry too much

Yoshiori: Melide say something
Melide: What? I wasn't listening.
Monomasa: Melide you've been spacing out all morning. Is it because you skipped breakfast?
Melide: N-no, I just didn't want any.
Mokdai: Melide, you have to eat!
Sui: I'm sensing some bias from all the takeout and instant noodle cups in your garbage can.
Mokdai: I-I've just been busy editing! I do eat healthy on weekends!
Sui: I guess that's okay? Maybe?
MC: both are problems / I'm worried for you two / oof, friendly fired
---
(A) Mokdai: OOF
Melide: I know...
---
Melide looks away and seems concerned about her stomach.
Melide: (sigh)
Huckle: Oh hey, everyone's here. I have a message for everyone going.
Huckle hands out bags for the main gang. MC gets a text.
MC: A checkup?
Huckle: Yup, mandatory for all first timers. The medical data also goes into your files and ID for better networking. MC, here's your bag.
Huckle hands over some kit.
Mokdai: Oh right, this will be my first expo as a hero!
Yoshiori: I haven't been checked since enlisting. Bleh.
Huckle: It's just for a day and it'll help your job.
Akashi: ...wait, where's the exam happening?
Huckle: Oh right, we'll be told the day of. We'll be taking a shuttle at the space port.
Sui: ...it's happening on a space ship?
Huckle: Yep. It's called...
MC: Medship Ophiucus 1?

Title Card: Keep It Breezy

Giant ship! Very clean feeling. Everyone's riding the bus that gets lifted in. Tons of people there.
Akashi: Wow, it's huge...
Crowne: It's the biggest ship in the Earth Sphere at max axes 570 m by 210 m. I did help with building it, but I didn't think it'd the test flight would be happening already.
Sui: All these people are new heroes and Operators?
Ryekie: There's some veterans, but I hear rookies number at least in the hundreds! There usually isn't that many newbies at once, but maybe it's related to there being more Monsters?
Okitaka: Howdy, y'all! Haven't seen ya in a blue moon.
Mokdai: Okitaka! Are you here leading things?
Okitaka: Sorta. Bit o' business collab, bit o' inspection, and here with the new guys.
Barrel: Heyo!
Furlong: H-hello. Nice weather today.
Barrel: What are you nervous about?
Furlong: W-we're flying. And there's so many people...
MC: Hi Okitaka! / Yay, Barrel! / There there, Furlong
(A) Okitaka: Hey, how's it hangin'? Wanna get lunch together? My treat.
(B) Barrel: Yay, MC! This exam's gonna be fun!
Furlong: Fun, how? Ow, your tail's hitting me!
(C) Furlong: R-right, I just need to not look outside. Weird how my acrophobia doesn't manifest during hero time.

Okitaka: Well if it ain't the Invisible Soldier himself. Heard all about ya thru the grapevine, can't wait to see ya in action!
Yoshiori: Get away from me!
Okitaka: Boo, yer no fun.
MC: wow / so Yoshiori hates that type of people... / is he really a big shot
Obsidius: S'up, people! Didn't expect to see so many familiar faces.
Akashi: Obsidius! ...wait, new heroes in Heroic Educators would mean--
Kyoichi: Yep, me! Nice ass, Aka-(bonk)-ahh!
Akashi: Welp. But are you really a new hero, Senpai?
Kyoichi: I just became one barely earlier than you guys!
Obsidius: Yeah, he's one of four new heroes in our agency. We also got two new Operators. I'm here to guide them.
MC: damn, you're big / hey Kyoichi~ / wow, so many people I know
(A) Obsidius: Thanks! Gotta keep up the workout in the lab! Wanna feel?
(B) Kyoichi: Aww, hey MC. How about you and I--
Akashi: I didn't know you wanted your ass kicked, Senpai
Kyoichi: I'm sorry, never mind.
Akashi: MC, stop giving him ideas!

Obsidius: Oh, you guys got a new girl? Hey, I'm Obsidius.
Melide: Huh? Oh, I'm Melide. Wow, you're big...
Obsidius: Comes with working with rocks all day!
Melide: You're sweet. I'm glad you're not scary.
Obsidius: What!? MC, am I scary!?
MC: you're intense? / nah / well this is cute
Plot twist!
???: Excuse me, are you all from the shuttles from Orient City?
It's Shidemasu!
Ryekie: Ahh! The Raidark insurance agent!
Shidemasu: Indeed. I am Hanemaru Shidemasu, and I will be observing the hero exams. Pleased to meet you.
MC: Hi I'm MC / what / Hot!
(A) Shidemasu: Yes, I've heard of you. Pleased to meet you.
Akashi: Okay wow he's nicer than he looks. Also what insurance?
(C) Akashi: You're into that!? Also what insurance?

Shidemasu: I say hero insurance, but it's insurance for heroes and Operators to cover medical and collateral.
Okitaka: It comes with the biz. People take national insurance, then add on private insurance. Wait, don't they tell y'all this when ya sign up?
Ryekie: UHHHH kinda forgot since we hadn't signed anyone on for a while after Mokdai! But we gave out pamphlets and paperwork, right!?
Mokdai: UMMMM I think I signed stuff???
MC: welp / yeah there was a lot / I think I saw something like that
Shidemasu: Oh right, you have hired new people. Would you like to buy insurance now? Join now and I can throw in hero suit insurance.
Ryekie: ASK HUCKLE! Actually why are you here!?
Shidemasu: Oh, whoops. I ran over trying to sell insurance and got ahead of myself.
Yoshiori: Damn, tell us how you really feel.
Shidemasu: Allow me to welcome you to the Ophiucus 1.

Shidemasu: To explain, this ship is a flying hospital that flies anywhere to offer service. The flight, environmental controls, medical services, and almost all other business is handled by the central computer AI Rasalhague. We hope you have a pleasant flight as you take your medical exam.
Sui: Wow, an AI handles all those different areas?
Crowne: I kinda wanna see this thing myself now.
MC: is that where tech is these days? / did nobody learn from Battle Network / omg so hi tech
Ding dong, announcement time!
PA System: Attention please. Last bus to and from Orient City departing momentarily. All outbound passengers please head to the space bus deck station.
Ryekie: Oh, that's us! Have a nice checkup!
Okitaka: I'mma get off too, then head back to Osaka from Orient City.
Obsidius: I'll bail too! Got work to do.
Shidemasu: Actually Okitaka and Obsidius, I need you two to stay.
Obsidius: What? Why?
Okitaka: Yeah, the bus is leavin' soon.
Shidemasu: Your agencies are ordering you both to get examined as well.
Obsidius and Okitaka: WHAT

Obsidius: But why tho!?
Okitaka: Yeah! I got examined forever ago!
Shidemasu: As I understand, you've both been dodging your regular checkups, so your agencies want you to do take it here where you can't run. Heroic Educators management in particular said, "do it bitch."
Obsidius: RUDE! I mean it's true I've been dodging checkups busy, but still! I thought they finally stopped bugging me about it, so why...!?
Obsidius has a flashback!
Rakta: Your agency told me they want you to do a full checkup. Would you like to book an appointment?
Obsidius: Nah. I promise I'll do it later?
Rakta: They also told me you said that for two years. I think they'll try something if you don't go yourself.
Present
Obsidius: Oh. I KNEW something was up when they asked me to take the newbies over!

Okitaka remembers something too.
Okitaka: ...wait.
Flashback!
Okitaka: Mkay, I'mma go now Ichi! Hold the fort until I get back!
Seiichirou: It'll be a while, but I guess. "Keep it breezy" as they say down south.
Okitaka: Weird, but okay?
Present
Okitaka: I CAN'T BELIEVE HE SET ME UP
Whining Obsidius and Okitaka.
MC: welp / I wonder how Rakta is? / I didn't know Seiichirou could speak country
Kyoichi: Yeah, sorry we knew Obsidius. He told us to keep quiet.
Obsidius: WHAT!? Who!?
Kyoichi: Marfik.
Obsidius: UGH! I know he means well but STILL!
Barrel: We weren't told, but we do kinda worry about you Vice Commander.
Furlong: Oh right, he did look different after the exam notice came in.
Okitaka: AND Y'ALL DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME!?
Ryekie: Welp, have fun with that! Bye!
Yoshiori: ...I didn't know Justice knew how to ragebait people.
Melide: I think he sincerely means that.
MC: Yeah, Ryekie can't lie.

Ding dong!
PA System: Attention, please. Checkups will be starting soon. Please go to your assigned lockers and change, starting with ID numbers...
Plot twist!
???: WAIT
Something stomps down the stairs this way!
Bygul: S-sorry I'm late! I'm here for the hero checkups!
Shaft: Wait, you still haven't paid for your space taxi ride!
Round cat and Shaft appear!
Bygul: Oh, right! ...wait, what!?
Shaft: Oh no, wait, I need to recalculate this since I got a little lost on the way here!
Bygul: You got a LOT lost! Also I can't pay, please help!
MC: what? / Shaft? / cute cat
(C) Bygul: O-oh, you mean me? Wow thanks, hehe...
Sui: Not really the time for that, MC.

Shaft: Oh, MC! I picked up this passenger at Orient City, then...
Bygul: It's not my fault! Except for the parts where I missed the bus and forgot the exam location! But not the part where we somehow went to Osaka instead of here!
Yyyyyep, that's a big ass space taxi fare. Something ain't right.
Mokdai: Shaft, you got lost again?
Shaft: ...y-yes.
MC: welp / I'll help calculate your fare / well it's not as bad as last time!
---
(C) Yoshiori: The hell you mean not as bad as last time???
---
Depressed Shaft redoes his math.
Bygul: Big cities are scary! But still, I'm finally here in the holy land! Once I finish the checkup, I can start winning at life!
Bygul goes to tap on the check in terminal. Shocked everyone present!
Bygul: oh no
Bygul accidentally smushes the terminal into the ground!
MC: okay wow what / look Mokdai, you're not alone anymore!
(C) Mokdai: Hey I never did anything like that!

Akashi: well damn
Shidemasu: Bygul, yes? I can check you in and tack on the repair fees.
Bygul: Sorry...
Depressed Bygul.
Shaft: Okay Bygul, I've redone the space taxi fare. Can you pay this?
click
Shaft: Okay thank you. Sorry about that, thank you for riding with us. Now, excuse me...
Shidemasu: Wait, are you Todoroki Shaft? Global Drivers Union has requested that you be examined.
Shaft: ...wait, they did? Sorry I forgot about it. I'll park my taxi!
Shaft runs off. Bygul yells at the ceiling!
Bygul: I'm not gonna let this get me down!
Meanwhile, in the Ophiucus 1 main computer room
Rasalhague: ...deploying barrier and jammers. Commencing the Plan™.
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Prologue Part 3 (Abridged)

Alberich: Oh yoo-hoooo! Like, don't forget about me, boys!
Sitri: Andvari!?
Ikutoshi: You seem different.
Alberich: Andvari? Who is that? I'm Alberich, thank you! And this treasure hunt calls to me! Fairy king, wizard, and connected to gold by fate, maybe! Applaud me!
MC: Whomst? Have we met before?
Aegir: Uh, you want in? What kinda asshole tries to sign up at this point?
Alberich: I'm just fashionably late! What king needs to fill out paperwork anyways? I only just saw the flyer for this event! (chokes) can't...breathe!
Aegir: ...so what'd you mean by the treasure calling you?
Alberich: I said what I said.
Aegir: (stares) ...fine, toss the damn coin already.
Ashigara: You're letting him in!?
Hermes: What's so special about him? Whatever.
Alberich: Here I go then!

Time for a crash course before setting off! Sitri has a question for MC.
Sitri: Soooo, what do you think of what's-his-face joining? Did Andvari go amnesiac? Is he his brother!?
MC: Dunno. Maybe we should call Andvari?
beep beep
Andvari: Yoooo, whatcha buyin'? ...MC? What? ...I'm at my resort! Oh the treasure hunt? Kinda interesting, but it's tourist season! ...no, I ain't go no brothers! Hanging up now, money calls!
click
Sitri: ...then who is that!? Oh whatever, crash course time!
Later
Makara: I'm here to teach you how to swim!
Sitri: L-like this?
Ashigara: Oh my god, so cool! Just like a ninja!
Makara: Breast stroke for long distance swimming, back stroke for breaks.
Sitri: Wow I learned that first one in school.
Ikutoshi: Eat my waves, slowpoke.
Sitri: Oh my god so fast! ...wait, this isn't a race!
Makara: And now here's how to float by treading water.
Tetsugyuu: The only thing I know how to do!
Motosumi: Why are you here if you can't swim!?
Makara: Remember, safety first!

Later
Reprobus: Hello, ace lifeguard here to teach you what to do in cases of emergencies. If you fall overboard, ball up.
Volkh: Hmm, heat preservation. Yet such a shameful pose to take!
Reprobus: In case of multiple overboards, hold hands and hold your arms out like a ring.
Alberich: How artistic!
Hermes: Regretting my life choices already...
Reprobus: Main thing to remember is to conserve energy. Now onto current reading and other theoretical stuff. 
Later
Ahab: why do I have to do this? Listen up, landlubbers. Sailing ain't easy... but you'll be on an automatic sailing ship, so if that still ain't enough, you got no place at sea. Now pay attention to the basics or I'll beat your ass! Got it!?
Participants: YES CAPTAIN

Later
Aegir: And now I'll be teaching y'all seafaring terminology!
MC: How much do we have to learn!? / help / Teach me something else!
---
(A) Aegir: Well this IS cramming. Gotta go fast and all that.
(B) Aegir: Weak. But y'all need to know this stuff. Can't be part of my collection without a little elbow grease!
(C) Aegir: Ooh, naughty. I'd offer to tonight, but maybe private teaching can come another time!
---
Tired participants. Aegir smirks.
Aegir: Nice work, boys!
Motosumi: Oh god is it finally over!? Tetsugyuu you think we oughta get certified now too? ...wait shit, he and the jocks burned out!
Hermes: Yeeeah I'm a little fried too.
Volkh: Did we actually need to learn seafaring terminology?
Alberich: Personally I found pirate speak quite entertaining. Yo ho ho!
Aegir: Wait, I forgot one last thing.
Ikutoshi: We STILL have to keep at it?
Aegir: Just one last thing. Y'all need to know what "all hands on deck" means.
Sitri: what
Aegir: It means we need everyone working together. Okay cool, now get to the boat!

Later
Aegir: Alrighty rookies, get on my ship! ...whatcha starin' at?
Surprised participants.
Aegir: (looks) Oh, the pirate flag. Ain't that cool?
MC: I'm in danger / did you have to / Arrr!
Aegir: No need to thank me, y'all! Oh, gotta hand you guys something.
Alberich: WAIT
Aegir: What?
Alberich: I have something to hand out too! Behold~!
finger snap
Arachne dresses up the event cast!
Sitri: WHAT
Ashigara: What just happened!?
Sitri and Ashigara: Cool!
MC: yeah! / why does no one have pants / niiiice

Volkh: Such...fine pirate wear!
Hermes: where do I even START!? When'd you even get these made!?
Alberich: Immediately after I saw the event flyer! I did it out of my noble magnanimity since this is a group event. You have to dress the part in Tokyo, honey!
Arachne: So true, dear! They aren't bespoke since it was such short notice, but they are my newest fashion pieces!
MC: Nice! / such wide fashion coverage / Ahoy!
Arachne: Aww, thank you! So do you like it? Also I brought this all myself when I heard you were here, MC. I wanted to dress Aegir too, but oh well. Bon voyage, everyone!
Arachne winks and leaves.
Tetsugyuu: Nice outfit apparently, boss! Wish our team got some too!
Motosumi: I don't wanna dress like THAT!
Ikutoshi: A-agreed! It looks like cosplay! I have totally never thought it looked cool for a second!
Gunzo: I did! Um, I'm not jealous or anything!
Alberich: Aww, tell us how you really feel, honeys! Buuut then again, why spend to dress up the enemy team?
Aegir: You know what, Alberich? Nice. Maybe I'll get an outfit made too. Oh wait, back to business. I was about to give y'all a sea map and ring.
Aegir pulls out some old map and a silver Toyosu branded ring.
Volkh: What's the ring for?
Aegir: Team captain ring and lucky charm at sea. Don't lose it, I custom ordered it. It moves the ship while on board among other things. Now get on!

Later
Time to decide team captains!
Volkh: So, I have leadership experience and--
Alberich: Oh no you don't! I am MAYBE a fairy king! No one is to be above me! And I MAYBE have seafaring experience!
Volkh: O-oh no, something he actually has over me! I suppose you would be more appropriate, if what you say is true.
Alberich: Of course, maybe!
Hermes: so like does "maybe" mean something different from where you're from?
Volkh: ...then I cede the captain's seat. I still insist I lead any battle units as battle captain!
Ashigara: Oh, oh! Can I be stew captain!?
Sitri: Cool whatever you said, Volkh! Does that mean Alberich's taking the ring?
Alberich: Like, hell no to that gross thing?
Sitri: B-but you said you want to be captain!
Alberich: UGH! Do you know how terribly it clashes with my gold ring!?
Ashigara: Well dang, you're a big brat too!
Volkh: Now that I look at it again, the ring is too small for me...
Hermes: (stares) What if I take it? If it doesn't matter, then--
Volkh: I propose we give it to MC since they are unfated to be on top.
MC: wait what / wow rude / (look at Hermes)
Volkh: (Aegir made it sound like the ring had other functions, so it should be safe with MC. I'll never take my eyes off them!)
Kinda weird mood here.
Hermes: ...okay fine, whatever then.

Later
Aegir: Everyone on? Cool! I'mma name the ships after the captains then! This one's the Alberich!
Alberich: Perfect for our band of gentlemen pirates!
Aegir: And that one's the Gunzo!
Gunzo: THEY MADE ME CAPTAIN BECAUSE I SAID I WAS RUGBY TEAM CAPTAIN!
Aegir: Have fun on your treasure odyssey!
And so two pirate ships set sail into Tokyo Bay.
Sitri: Wow! I haven't sailed in forever!
Ashigara: Adventure! Sucks Gunzo's on the other team but--wait how'd they get so far away!? WHAT?
Hermes: Event gimmick, different routes.
Volkh: Different maps then?
Sitri and Ashigara: (GASP!)
MC: Wait, both of you?
Hermes: Eh, it's an event. It'll be cool.
Alberich: Ahoy there! Set sail for the treasure that is already mine! Maybe! AHAHAHA!
Meanwhile, back at port
Aegir: Pffft, it ain't gonna be that easy.
Aegir watches the ships sail. Someone walks up.
Dagon: Oh they're already gone? And what do you mean by that?
Aegir: Nuthin' serious, just sendin' assassins to make things difficult. Little mutual polishing.
Dagon: Oh is that all? MC's still going to be safe, right?
Upset Dagon. Casual Aegir.
Aegir: Meh, they oughta be fine. Got eyes in the sky just in case.
Dagon: Interesting choice of words. Fine, keep me posted.
Aegir: This gonna be good! Can't wait to see what surprise Alberich brings!
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Prologue Part 2 (Abridged)

Treasure hunt day at Toyosu!
Sitri: Hey Senpai! Nice weather today! I was worried about being late, but did you just get here? Nice!
MC: Hi Sitri! / you're perky for how hot it is / (stare at cute)
---
(AB) Sitri: Gotta be excited in summer!
(C) Sitri: W-what? I see that sweet summer child look!
---
Curious Sitri.
Sitri: Wait, is it really just us? Oh!
Ikutoshi: Oh, hey Sitri. And MC. Oh wait, MC's your chaperone?
MC: Hey Ikutoshi, I'm chaperoning. / Where's Kagutsuchi?
(C) Ikutoshi: Not here. It's not like we're glued together, you know.

Sitri: W-what? Dad's out at work and buying milk! And you're a middle schooler too!
Ikutoshi: Well I can be sort of an adult. And this seems like good training, so I couldn't come with someone. Needing a chaperone is just official stance anyways...but maybe they needed it up, you big baby.
Sitri: Screw you too! Jackass!
MC: I sense jealousy / Should I have asked you to join? / ooh, rivals
---
(A) Ikutoshi: W-what? No! But yeah I'm surprised any other middle schoolers came for this.
(B) Ikutoshi: W-what? It's not like I wanted you to. But I guess it might be fun if you're here. Same with other middle schoolers.
(C) Ikutoshi: Are you kidding? I mean, I'm surprised any other middle schoolers turned up, but is one with a chaperone rival material?
---
Sitri: You wanna go!?
MC steps in. Someone else comes by.
Ashigara: Haha, too slow Gunzo!
Gunzo: I-I just got lost in a new place!
MC: Ashigara! / Gunzo? (No Kyuma either?)
(A) Ashigara: Holy crap, MC? This must be fate!
(BC) Gunzo: MC? You're joining this thing!?
Ashigara: Ooh, fate!

Ashigara: This really is the best idea I had in my life!
Gunzo: Calm down already! ...funny that MC is here even though Kyuma isn't. Silver linings and all that.
MC: Bad time? / Silver lining? / what happened?
---
(A) Gunzo: Okay yeah that sounded rude, my bad. Senpai dragged me here, and stuff says I shouldn't leave him alone.
(B) Gunzo: Uh, not that I meant anything weird by that! Totally just friendly greeting! B-but anyways Senpai dragged me here, and stuff says I shouldn't leave him alone.
(C) Gunzo: Stuff. Senpai dragged me, and I can't leave him alone for other reasons.
---
Gunzo: Kyuma almost got dragged in too. I was gonna talk with him about stuff but--(grabbed)--AAAA
Ashigara: Whatcha guys talking about? Hey look, a ship! Let's look around!
Gunzo: We're late as it is! Hey, stop pulling me along! AAAAAA!

Ashigara pulls Gunzo away. Someone is talking to himself.
Volkh: ...hmm, Toyosu is admittedly impressive! I must not drop my guard here! But why are we meeting in front of the school instead of the dock...?
MC: Huh, you're here too? / Yay, Volkh! / Hmm, enemy of Kamui.
Volkh: Ah, Court Jester Veles! What the hell Why are you here!? Did Lord Perun foresee this? Wait, I am totally not here on Setagaya business! Definitely not on Lord Perun's orders!
MC: gee, tell me how you really feel / damn, your workload sucks / I haven't even said anything
(A) Volkh: W-what!? I am definitely no spy! Such is beneath an alpha as I!
(B) Volkh: S-stop looking at me like that! Even an alpha like I has obligations to attend to! Things I could not refuse, but still...
(C) Volkh: H-how dare you cast such eyes on the Werewolf Count! An alpha like myself has reasons beyond frivolity for being here! Things I could not refuse, but still...

Volkh: I-in any case, I am here to treasure hunt and we will be rivals! Prepare yourself, not even Kamui can save you out at sea! We shall not fraternize. Now excuse me while I scope out the enemy lines!
MC: Welp. I wonder if anyone else is turning up?
MC senses staring as they watch Volkh go. The starer almost leaves but gives up pretty quickly on being caught.
Hermes: Oh hey MC! What a coinkydink.
MC: how's it going, Hermes? / Faker / what, don't like me being here?
(A) Hermes: ...good. Same as you, it seems.
(B) Hermes: Okay hold on. Do I look convincingly happy yet? ...what? What's so surprising about me being here?
(C) Hermes: Nah. Totes legit happy to see you again.

Hermes: What? Olympian patron of thieves just wandering around here. The buddy cops are doing alright, so I gotta say bye to the sea for a bid before they get me. They been hanging around Cafe Asterism on their break too like goddamn mold. I mean, nothing~! Anyways, just came to hang out. Okay bye~.
Hermes leaves, fake smile and all. Someone else stomps up.
???: OH MY GOD, BOSS
Tetsugyuu runs in with a charge and a bear hug!
Tetsugyuu: You really DID turn up for this!
Motosumi: Oh geez, let go before you suffocate them!
MC: Cool, Tetsugyuu... / Motosumi help
(A) Tetsugyuu: Oh, whoops! Sorry 'bout that.
One more bear hug before letting go.
(B) Tetsugyuu: Alright, let go you giant dumb dog.
Motosumi drags Tetsugyuu's arms open.

Time to start asking why everyone's there!
Tetsugyuu: Treasure hunting for money! And I'll give you something if I find something cool.
Motosumi: I just came across this dumb bitch and had different reasons for joining. Tianzun told a lot of us about this thing. Sanzo's unslick ass said he wanted money for raising his kid and totally not a cool vacation. I mean I need money for the babies too. I'm honestly surprised only me and Tetsugyuu showed up from Umamichi.
Someone walks over.
Wolf A: Treasure hunters, this way to Aegir's classroom!
Classroom
Aegir: Okay guys, explanation time! First, I'm Aegir, the one in charge of this event.
Aegir starts judging everyone present.
Aegir: Nice, just like I previously investigated.
Sitri: wait what
Aegir: Oh, I specially picked y'all. Even the sus ones.
Volkh sweats. Hermes keeps his poker face.
Aegir: Welp, gotta keep it interesting! ...hmm, you're Sitri? I don't think you need a chaperone, but then again you brought MC with ya! Fate's funny, huh MC?
MC: (peace sign) / (shrug) / (ignore)
(A) Aegir: Heh, nothing fazes you huh? This oughta be a good surprise.
(B) Aegir: Oh you. This oughta make things good.
(C) Aegir: Yeeeessss. I'm always down to chase ya, but we got business today.

Aegir: Right, listen up y'all! Pirate treasure map, super special treasure! And that ain't even the half of it! We're turning this into a race between two groups!
Shocked participants! Well almost everyone.
Participants: WHAT
Hermes: (stare)
MC: what
Motosumi: Wait, I gotta win or I get nuthin'?
Tetsugyuu: Cool!
Ikutoshi: Well I do agree it's more interesting like that.
Volkh: (Hmm, I see...)
Hermes: So are you deciding the teams?
Aegir: Nah. We'll use this thingy.
clink
Aegir: Coin flip! Because luck is important to pirates. If we don't split evenly, we'll figure something out!
Ashigara: I might split up with Gunzo!?
Gunzo: Why'd we even come then!?
Sitri: And I might not team up with MC-senpai?
Aegir: Oh no, you two can stick together. Chaperone stuff.
Ikutoshi: Aww, isn't that nice? You get to keep your babysitter.
Sitri: HNNNGH
MC: you really are jealous, huh? / I hope we team up / damn, chill
Ikutoshi: N-no it's not like that!
Aegir: Let's get on with it. Who first...
Hermes with the interrupt again!
Hermes: How about MC?
MC: wait what / okay! / (he's up to something)
Aegir: Hmm... why's that?
Hermes: Uhh, more fun that way? Lotsa people wanna team up with MC.
Aegir: I guess. Just like there's gonna people who DON'T want to team up with MC, hmm?
Hermes: ...maybe so.
Aegir: (stares)
Hermes: (stares)
Aegir: Okay Hermes, get your ass over here and flip first.
Hermes: Wait, what!? Why?
Aegir: 'cuz I think it'll be more fun that way, that's why. But seriously, I see a wise guy trying to start shit. You can do whatever, but you ain't controllin' me, got it?
Short tension. Hermes seems to give in.
Hermes: Alright, alright. Let's do this thing.

A bunch of coin flips later
Ikutoshi, Gunzo, Motosumi, and Tetsugyuu are together. MC's party has Sitri, Ashigara, Volkh, and an unhappy Hermes.
Ashigara: NOOOO, GUNZO!
Gunzo: Senpai, stop crying since that means I have to hold it together! ...um, can anything be done if I'm declared his chaperone?
Tetsugyuu: NOOOO, BOSS!
Motosumi: I get it, but chill dammit!
Lots of mixed feelings.
Aegir: Welp, deal with it. Alrighty, time to finish prepping--
SLAM
Alberich: Oh yoo-hoooo! Like, don't forget about me, boys!
Surprised rest of class!
MC: Andvari! ...wait, no?
End of episode part