The next day.
Rando A: Hey have you heard? Has anyone told you? The Fabulous Summer Host club is doing another event! But the club's reviews are bombing so I'm unsure about going even if it's for Shino.
Rando B: Let's go anyway! Might be fun to mix things up.
Lots of people are coming because they heard "special event!"
Hei Long Yi Quan: Wow, Sarutahiko! I'm gonna use my influencer status to turn attention your way!
Flashback!
HLYQ: Life's full of stuff you can't do anything about...
Sarutahiko: Hei Long Yi Quan, I need your help! And your star power! I'll pay later after it works!
Later on
HLYQ: Heyo! Since you're asking me to edit, you okay with letting me fill in the video's subject matter?
Sarutahiko: Sure!
Present
Shino: Hello. I've missed you.
Rando B: OMG Shino???
Shino: What? I was thinking I wouldn't see you anymore.
Rando B: NO I NEED YOU MASTER SHINO, I'LL BUY ALL THE DRINKS
Shino: ...just Shino is fine. Call me that, please.
Rando B: EEEEE
Elsewhere in the bar
Y'golonac: Hey baby, thanks for askin' for me again! Today's my turn to make YOU happy!
Rando A: Um, c-can I call you Y'golly?
Y'golonac: Sure can! Ain't it a bit too cute for someone my age tho?
Rando A: Yaaay!
So much screaming and crying! Happy screaming and crying!
Hei Long Yi Quan: Whoa, what a change!
Bael: Well well, if it isn't you. I heard from Sarutahiko.
HLYQ: Hi! You said this was a shuffle event? Nice!
Bael: Oh you haven't seen everything yet. How about I sit with you until then?
Later
Team Tsukuyomi is in on this shuffle event too.
Barong: Hey kitty. You up for THAT today?
Blue: OH GOD YES I'll try to make you happy!
Barong: Ooh, nice~.
Blue: It's great doing something for you for once.
Barong: Aww! No promises about what happens next.
Blue: GAAAASP!
Switching things up for today!
Tsukuyomi: Isn't this nice?
Y'golonac: Why are ya standin' there smiling by yourself? Think you won already?
Tsukuyomi: Oh hi, don't mind me, business as usual. Game's still up in the air.
Y'golonac: ...ya really sure about helpin' us?
Tsukuyomi: Yep! This does help us too, you know. Plus I told you to not use your power. Go ask for other help all you like. Honestly I was glad when I heard you agreed to Sarutahiko's idea. You take too much on yourself, you can ask your guildmates for help.
Y'golonac: O-oh...
Tsukuyomi: Everyone helps me during the day, and you help so much with the management.
Y'golonac: Y-ya gotta do a little better as the boss about town, Tsukuyomi!
Tsukuyomi: wait is that what we're talking about?
Mermaid A: Hi excuse me Tsukuyomi, is Sarutahiko not in today?
Tsukuyomi: You're that one girl who's a customer of his, right? He's getting ready in the back.
Mermaid: Oh good. So I need to talk about something and...
Later
People are way more excited today than they have all event! So many good vibe reviews!
MC: Problem solved? / Sarutahiko was right / I wish I was a customer!
Perun: HA! He could've just agreed to serve us, but it is good how happy the customers are. You may have whatever you desire, Sarutahiko!
MC: Still uppity I see / Can you actually host like normal? / Are you NOT doing your bossy host thing?
---
(BC) Perun whistles badly. Hmm...
---
Tetsugyuu: (grabs mic) Hey you guys, having fun?! Wondering why I'm in a swimsuit? Hit it, Sarutahiko!
So many bubbles flooding the bar!
Sarutahiko: Hey guys, bubble party! Who wants to sink into my bubbles and love?
SCREAMING AND CRYING MOBS!
Sarutahiko: Love you guys! (looks embarrassed shooting rainbow bubbles)
Perun: WHAT
Tetsugyuu: We got bubble guns for everyone too! Shoot a bubble heart and hit a host, get something Really Nice!
Everyone takes interest. Everyone.
Bael, Perun and Y'golonac: Hmmmm...
MC: (hmm, who to shoot) / this cannot end well / I gotta get out of here!
Y'golonac: Oh noooes, ah just slipped mah fingers tryna shoot mah babies and now I shot at MC!
MC pops the bubble!
Perun: Pffft, you couldn't hit a snowflake in a Kitezh blizzard. Behold the emperor's Imperial Privilege-powered marksmanship!
Y'golonac: Back off bub, MC's MINE
Bubble heart bullet hell time!
MC: OH NO
Y'golonac: MC, you can shoot me if ya want~!
Perun: No, ME!
MC: ...oh whatever! / (shoot at them) / (shoot at customers)
(AC) MC shoots at the customers.
(B) MC misses and the shots go towards the customers.
Bael: Look out! (bodyblocks for a mob) Okay good, it should be ME shooting for your heart, cherie. But oh my, what is this Really Nice something or other you want, MC--
Perun: HA! You haven't been hit at all, Bael!
Y'golonac: Oh no, I wiped off the bubble because I thought ya had sumthin' spill on ya, whoopsies~!
Bael: (wait what, when!?)
Standoff! ...and then truce as the three point bubble guns at MC!
Bael: First to hit MC while evading the customers wins?
Perun: Simple enough. I'll just take you all!
Y'golonac: MC, just take a fall for me already mkay?
MC: Nooo~ / what if I give you all attention later / GODDAMMIT
Bael, Perun and Y'golonac: GET EM
BATTLE START (more happens after)
Sarutahiko: Now what do we have to say for ourselves?
Sarutahiko has Bael, Perun, and Y'golonac doing the Japanese Sitting of Shame.
Sarutahiko: Y'all ever think there might be a reason the customers review bombed you guys?
Perun: Sorry...
Sarutahiko: ...well as long as you get it. Go on, have fun with everyone in the bubble party.
Bubble party's still going on with everyone else.
Shino: S-stop! I am no pet!
Pet bathtime play!
Barong: Love all you guys!
Barong is getting buried in bubbles!
Tsukuyomi: Aww, don't just stand there...you want me to cover you in bubbles? Hmm, maybe I will then.
MC: I think people are starting to forget the goal, but eh, whatever's fun! / SHINO IS MINE
Y'golonac: Meh, fine. I'mma big boy, shoot me all ya like!
Bael: Let's go Perun. We shouldn't let Team Tsukuyomi get ahead again.
Perun: Hmm. Very well. Servants, I permit you to wash me!
Sarutahiko smiles as Team Y'golonac gets back into things.
MC: Thanks, Sarutahiko. Sorry my team's such a pain. / (shoot him)
(AB) Sarutahiko: It's cool. Let's get back in there too!
Just as Sarutahiko turns to go...
(C) Sarutahiko: WHAT? Okay you're in for a bubble gun fight now!
Just when Sarutahiko gets really close...
Tsukuyomi: Order up, three champagne towers for Sarutahiko! Come on over!
Sarutahiko: Holy shit they're huge!
Biggest towers yet.
Mermaid A: Surprise! A gift from all your stans!
All of his regulars are standing by the towers!
Mermaid A: Figured we had to do this when we heard you were helping the other team. We stan that selfless kindness!
Sarutahiko: B-but it ain't that big a deal!
Sarutahiko's fans all yell thanks at him! One of them calls him cute.
Sarutahiko: WHO SAID THAT
Tsukuyomi: Aww, isn't that nice? Your fans saw how hard you worked and now you're number one today. You know what that means, right?
Tsukuyomi gives Sarutahiko a crowned rubber ducky. Sarutahiko steps up.
Sarutahiko: Oh my god thanks guys. I never thought I'd have so much support, seriously.
The fans cheer him on. Gone is the accused, lonely traitor guide.
Sarutahiko: Well shit I might cry. Let's keep bubble partying, cheers!
MC: (toast to him) Cheers!
Y'golonac: Holy shit that tower???
Perun: How DARE you use us!?
Sarutahiko: N-no, that's not--
Bael: I hope you know what's coming.
Sarutahiko: NOOOO
No beatdown comes. Instead, Sarutahiko gets lifted up.
Y'golonac: Heh, naw we ain't doin' that. Congrats!
Barong: Good for you, man!
Perun: Heh. Okay, you managed an impressive takeover. It's not happening again!
Bael: Oh, so we're not dropping him on his head?
Sarutahiko: P-please say psych...
Bael, Perun, and Y'golonac: (stares)
Barong: It's okay, I'll catch you Sarutahiko!
The teams are getting to be closer friends!
Later
Yellow: Aww man, I missed the summer host blame train and now people are shittalking ME!
Someone sneaks up from behind...
Yellow: whomst--wait what are you...AAAAAHH
End of Episode
No comments:
Post a Comment