Thursday, July 27, 2023

Jurassic Summer Vacation Prologue Part 2 (Abridged)

The Velvet Claude's office
Claude: Thank you for coming, Setagaya Agricultural Academy owner Perun.
Perun: Hmph, enough formalities. Let's get down to the student exchange business!
Ooh, the drama. Snow and Volkh are standing behind their lords as the school war of student exchanges begins! Champions Students are sent out to become the very best like no one ever was~
Perun: Heh. You believe you can win? No mere amateur can hope to prevail in a school specialized in knowledge of farming and forestry!
Claude: Oh I understand. But being handicapped is what makes things such fun for us! Underestimate our best at your own risk!
Claude and Perun: HAHAHA
Snow and Volkh staring contest!

Claude: Now then. I give you the initiative. Declare your first player.
Perun: No you.
Claude: Hmm...are you saying it's disadvantageous to go first?
Perun: Ha! Cheap joke for an emperor!
Snow and Volkh: (staring continues)
Snow: (Oh Master Claude, you've grown up so much to rise up against another emperor.)
Volkh: (Lord Perun, you are so blindingly gallant!)
They're vibing.

Perun: Hmph. I see it has come to the traditional Tokyo way to break this impasse.
Claude: Indeed. Discussion has failed, so only one method remains.
Snow and Volkh reach for their artifacts...

Claude: I CHALLENGE YOU TO A CHILDREN'S STRATEGY GAME!

One RPS game later
Perun: NOOOO I SHALL NEVER FORGET THIS HUMILIATION OF LOSING TO ROCK
Volkh: My lord, please! We can just crush them in the school war and regain your dignity!
Snow: It brings a tear to my eyes how fortune smiles upon you, Master!
Claude: Hold that thought, Snow. Save it for when we actually win the war.
One breather later

Perun: Fine, I just have to win in the end! I'll start by playing Yamasachi in defense mode! His special game is Yamasachi Survival Hunting! The winner is the one who collects the most food from the mountains by the end of the exchange term! Go big or go home!
Claude: Hmm... I will play Horokeu Kamui in attack mode!
Volkh: WHAT
Claude: What? He's a hunter. It makes sense.
Snow: ...does that mean you've chosen someone else to play against Volkh? I see Setagaya has taken you too lightly and lost the plot over obsessing over connections!
Claude: Enough of that, Snow. It feels weird for you to do that in front of the enemy.
Snow: ...forgive me for speaking out of turn.

Perun puts a hand on Volkh's shoulder.
Perun: ...get up and calm down. Do you doubt that Yamasachi will win?
Volkh: N-no, of course not!
Perun: Then everything is fine. Whatever scheme he has, we shall crush beneath our feet!
Volkh: Yes my liege!
Snow: Hmm...I do indeed sense the weight of history behind Perun.
Claude: Of course, that makes this worth doing!
Back to business.

Claude: Right, my turn. I play Andvari in defense mode! His game will be Gold Monopoly in business studies! He who makes the most money by the end wins!
Perun: Heh, are you ignorant of my school's ace? HA! I will play Volos in attack mode!
Snow: I see...he plans to use Volos's brand name monopoly on food to target all of Tokyo!
Volkh: But wait my lord. Volos said he wants to give better quality ingredients to ever larger crowds. Wouldn't that be inappropriate for a profit seeking venture?
Perun: Ha. I know how to get him on board.
Claude: You call this a competition? You must be jesting.

Moving on!
Perun: The last card I will play for Setagaya's defense will be...ME! My challenge will be a poetry contest!
Claude: Huh. I never expected you to take part in the student exchange yourself. And how do you even plan to have your battle decided?
Perun: I have it covered!
Claude: Oh okay then. If you're up, then the other games should be fine. And you must have a reason for this of some kind.
Perun: I wish to go up against Fergus Mac Roich for my battle! He is the stuff of legends of love and battle! He's perfect for this! And now that I think about it, why haven't you put him up yet?
Claude and Snow look concerned.
Claude: I would, but I can't.
Perun: W-WHY!?
Claude: Because he's not here. Said he's on a journey to find himself or some such. He's in Yurakucho now.

Yurakucho
Macroich: Christine I love you!
Christine: No, Raoul, stop! Because of our love...
Macroich: But you never said love to me before!
Macroich is an actor.

Christine: Because HE will hear! He'd kill you out of jealousy if I said that!
Cipactli arrives. Macroich and Christine look aside into the darkness.

Macroich: ...pffft, you're imagining things Christine. There's no Phantom there.
Cipactli grabs Christine!
Cipactli: Christine, Christine, you lied to me when you said you loved me! You love HIM!
Christine: You lied to me first! You said you'd teach me music! Monster!
Christine tries to run but fails!

Cipactli: Love me! I can do better!
Bzzzzt

PA: Intermission time! Ten minutes until the last part of I Can't Believe It's Not Phantom of the Opera!
Guy A: OMG Imix is so cool!
Girl B: He never shows up outside anywhere. How can I get closer?
Guy A: Welp, time to give up. He's famous for only ever showing up on stage and nowhere else. Honestly we don't even know if Imix is really his name. But he's so mysterious and cool!
Bzzzzt. Show time!

Later
Cipactli goes back to his home underground to laze around and watch Youtube with pizza. Then Christine walks in.

Cipactli: ...what? I'm not giving you any of my pizza.
Christine: It's okay, I don't like pizza that's drowned in cheese like that. Still, you really should stop looking so listless like that. What if a fan saw you like this?
Cipactli: It's just you here. Leave me alone back here at least. (takes a pizza slice)
Cipactli: So, why ARE you here?
Christine: You told me you wanted to shine brighter than anyone on stage once. You were so intense back then that it'd make people wonder if that was true. But lately...have you been having trouble focusing on your acting Imix Cipactli?
Cipactli: (frowns)
Cipactli stops reaching for another slice. He looks grim and ashamed.

End of Episode

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