Ebisu, Hotei, and Benten (narrating): We must purge the seven disasters and bring the seven fortunes. The seven disasters are sunlight damage, starlight damage, storm damage, water damage, fires, droughts, and theft. The seven fortunes are longevity, good luck, popularity, integrity, authority, love and respect, and bounty. That's why we once gathered together on the Treasure Ship to visit people's first dreams of the year as the Seven Lucky Gods.
Benten: Heeey you guys! Thanks for coming to see us! Today I'll be Benzaiten!
Narration: The group split up due to creative differences according to Benten. One of the Seven Lucky Gods was Daikoku, whose name, body, and power is now given to someone else. That someone else is the ex-World Representative of Takamagahara Okuninushi, known as Onamjji no Mikoto in his youth and the one whose fate was tied to Inaba. Okuninushi has Reasons for borrowing Daikoku's identity, including enemies who he can't let know of his presence. Nobody can know about this, especially the other Lucky Gods.
Present
Daikoku: And that's everything about security here. Tell the head priest I said hello when he comes back. Excuse my interruptions when you're busy. I have to go back now.
Later, after Touji and the other shrine workers find some time to take a break
Agyou: OH MY GODS IT'S BEEN BUSY!
Inaba: Nice work Touji, Aggy.
Agyou: STOP CALLING ME AGGY! Oh never mind that for now. Get us water! Touji is sweating buckets!
Inaba: Here you go! That enough?
Agyou: A kettle!? Where's the glasses!?
Inaba: Aww yissss. Prank succ--
Agyou: >8C
Inaba: I'msorryI'msorry! I'll get you the glasses now!
Later
Agyou: Why do you have to be like that, Inaba? This place would be a mess if I weren't around to--oh Touji you okay? Inaba brought water!
Touji: Yes, thank you two. I never expected the chief to come here...
Inaba: Thanks for helping guys. Normally it's me and the priest working here. I bet the shrine you two normally work at must be busy too...
Touji: It's okay. It looks like the rush ended, good job.
Agyou: Easy peasy!
Inaba: You're still doing a lot, thanks!
Touji pats Inaba and Agyou.
Agyou: The White Rabbit Mikuji is super popular. This one box feels more lucky than the others though...
Inaba: Good eye, Aggy! This one's my artifact.
Agyou: oh
Inaba: That's all you have to say!?
Touji: You know about mikuji, right Agyou?
Agyou: Yep! Messages and advice for praying visitors.
Touji: Correct, just like at our shrine. But here, Inaba is in charge of them. He made them earlier with his power enchanted in.
Agyou: Wait, he makes them by hand!? That'd bring in so many good boy points!
Inaba: Tee hee. Stare and be amazed!
Shark: shark noise!
Touji: There is as much faith in fortune sticks in Tokyo as there is for Santa during Christmas, enough to go beyond the App's activation range normally. I guess we can say there's a benefit to a majority of Tokyo's people believing in them.
Agyou: Huh!
Inaba: Also, people like getting good news whenever, wherever! It's a miracle from my old Master.
Inaba's fortune sticks are under Onamuji/Okuninushi's protection on the hierarchy. As long as his authority isn't overshadowed, it will shine forever.
Agyou: Wow, much good boy points. Wait, can't you use it yourself to find your old Master then?
Inaba: No...he's higher on the hierarchy than me and powers don't work on people like that.
Agyou: Oh
Touji: I had the chief take a fortune too since he was here. Thanks Inaba, I hope your bonds are fruitful.
Inaba: Thanks!
Touji: Okay we should get back to work.
Inaba: Excuse me, Touji? Can I go on break?
Touji: Oh right, you said you'd be meeting someone. Very well. Our replacements should be here soon so we can go on break then.
Inaba: Cool, later!
Outside
Kengo: UGHHH, the line is so long!
Shirou: Stop yelling!
Hotei: Y'all impatient, Kengo. Ya need to be patient 5.67*10^9 years!
Kengo: Why!? That's so freaking long!
Benten: Cold.
Ryouta and an Evil slide into Moritaka's formal coat!
Ryouta: Yep, you gotta double up on coats in the cold.
Moritaka: Isn't this a bit much?
MC: Me too / I wish I had a fur coat / Hands, cold
(A) Moritaka: What!? W-well, the front is open if you like
(B) Gullinbursti: !! Master, you can hold me! Wait, am I not furry enough? My core is blacksmith made though!
(C) Benten: Why are you blushing? Here, you can borrow my hand warmer. Bandmates gotta look after each other!
Ebisu: That line is really long. I hope we aren't keeping Inaba waiting too long.
Hotei: Eh, we left a note. We can always call if we have to. I'm sure as the sun rises he'll come hopping like a literal bunny!
Gullinbursti: Master, there's noise up ahead. And...something small is...hopping this way...
MC: wait what
A loud voice approaches!
???: There, Sharkie!
Inaba bounces in!
Inaba: Master! My new master in Tokyo! (grabs MC's hand)
Inaba: I'm Inaba! My matchmaking is perfect, and thank you for coming!
MC: Nice meeting you for the first time? I guess? / bnnuy! / (pet)
(A) Inaba: Yes, this is our first meeting! I've always wanted to meet you!
(B) Inaba: What, my ears? It's okay, you can touch them.
(C) Inaba: O-oh, how bold for a first meeting...ticklish!
Shirou: No wait, MC get back. Uhh...Inaba, right?
Inaba: That's me! Are you master's friend?
Shirou: ...nice to meet you, I'm Motoori Shirou. You know MC?
Inaba: Nope! But we did meet once upon a dream.
Kengo: How does that even work? And what do you need with MC anyw--
Inaba: DUNNO
Gang: what???
Inaba: I dunno, my artifact just said they'd be my best match for a master! I'm still new, but take good care of me! ...I don't know what to do from here either though...
MC: Uhhh...help me Lucky Gods!
Benten: What, what do you expect from us? He just asked us for help.
Hotei: Huh, this really a first time meetin'? Were you two connected in a past life or summat?
Ryouta: We dunno, MC has amnesia...
Touji and Agyou arrive.
Touji: Ugh. You people cause a commotion wherever you guys go.
Gullinbursti: Touji! Sharp as ever!
Touji: Good to see you in good health, Gullinbursti. It's been a year or so since last time?
Agyou: You guys? What're you doing here?
MC: What? What are YOU guys doing here? / (shrug)
Touji: I came to help out. Don't tell anyone, but the priest is out.
Agyou: And I came to help Touji! I go to other shrines too if they need help!
Girl A: Ooh, pretty white rabbit. Is he the one the rumors were about?
Guy B: Think the bit about his fortune sticks is fr? I thought it was sus.
Boy C: Look, a priest and komainu! Maybe it's real after all!
Agyou: Touji, shouldn't we move elsewhere? People are making noise!
Touji: Well this is the rabbit year. Alright Inaba, talk with MC later.
Inaba: B-but...!
MC: It's okay, I promise we'll talk later.
Inaba: Oh, you're so kind... This really is a good match!
Inaba starts talking about himself as he goes.
Inaba: I'm sure my wish is to see a certain someone, and I'll do my best to serve you if you'll make it happen!
MC: So who are you looking for?
Inaba: His name is--!
Elsewhere
Daikoku: Did something happen? Is that why there's so much noise? And White Rabbit Mikuji...
A faint memory resurfaces.
Daikoku: !! This feeling is--
The stick in his hand falls apart and a light writes something out.
Daikoku: Isn't that...white rabbit fur? And those words...
Inaba (Fortune): The worst reunion of all time! Stop fighting and let it happen.
Daikoku: ...what? What is going on--whoa!
The fortune stick starts blacking out from where Daikoku touched it!
Elsewhere with the crowds
Visitor A: Hey my stick turned dark!
Visitor B: Doom!
Inaba: What!?
MC: wait what's going on
Benten: ooh, banger?
Ebisu, Hotei, and Benten: oh
Daikoku: !! (smiles)
Ebisu, Hotei, and Benten: (smiles)
Daikoku is getting five alarm red alert vibes. He starts to move his feet and...
Daikoku: (bails) BYE, JUST YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD FRIENDLY POLICE CHIEF
Benten: Stop right there if you don't want us chasing you! That's totally him, but why he's so different!?
Inaba: NOOOO, Master Onamuji!
Ebisu: Who? ...uh, him?
Hotei: Haha, this is hilarious!
MC: Wow he ran fast. / I don't wanna get back in line!
Benten: Get him! Ebisu, you know what to do right!?
Ebisu: Much as I don't want to! If that IS Daikoku, I get why he'd run!
Inaba: Ebisu please help me see Master Onamuji!
MC: What? Not Daikoku?
Benten: Hey did he have eyeshadow on? When did Daikoku go for the goth look!?
Daikoku: Stop making me sound weird, Benten! Oh no my mouth just said that!
Hotei: Old habits die hard or something? Dunno.
Daikoku: NO! Ack, I did it again!
Benten: Aww, Daikoku it IS you. Ebisu, Hotei, do it!
Ebisu: I dunno, something seems differe--
Benten: Do it, bitch
Ebisu: I'MSORRY Maybe Daikoku! Fishing rod, fly!
Ebisu's cast flies at Daikoku.
Daikoku: Presence Concealment!
Daikoku claps the back of his hands together.
Ebisu: Hey wait, that's Ama-no-Sakate! Kotoshironushi used it to hide himself in Takamagahara!
Daikoku snakes through the stalls and spreads a cloud of darkness! Ebisu's fishing hook loses track of him and returns.
Ebisu: He got away...then!?
MC: what
Benten: ...Hotei, I choose you!
Hotei: I'm up, y'all! Now don't be mad Daikoku(?) we just wanna talk. Secondary Noble Phantasm go! Benevolence Anchor! Love and peace!
When more than one Lucky God is in one place, the Treasure Ship artifacts they have can use powers they can't use solo.
Hotei: Magnet, Anger Emotion Pull!
The anchor flies at Daikoku. But just as it's about to catch him...
Green Pirate: COME AT ME BRO
Red Pirate: You wanna piece of me!?
...Daikoku misdirects the anchor at other targets.
Green Pirate: Fraaands
Red Pirate: FRIENDSHIP! BFFs, man!
Hotei: Benten, we got a slippery one!
Benten: Right, he knows how your guys' artifacts work.
Ebisu: Not only that, but he knows Takamagahara's--
Benten: oh yeah weren't you a baby when--
Ebisu: Yes, I drifted from Takamagahara to Wa no Kuni, so I know. But...why?
Inaba: He's Master Onamuji from Takamagahara!
Benten: ...whoever he is, we gotta catch him first. He must be guilty or he wouldn't be running.
Ebisu: But anyone would run away if you were chasing them with that look on yo--
Benten: STFU
Ebisu: OW
Hotei: Niiiice. Repetitions are the basics for performers.
Daikoku disappears through the crowds towards the entrance!
Ebisu: Benten, we'll lose him if he gets away from the shrine!
Ebisu is floating on his fish pillow acting as lookout.
Hotei: We gotta gut up to get through! Who's got the biggest gut? Oh wait, it's ME!
Benten: ...
Hotei: Oh, misread the crowd. Any ideas?
MC: Daikoku! / That was bad and you should feel bad, Hotei
(B) Hotei: yeah
Benten: Is Daikoku really hiding from us fr?
Inaba: Master Onamuji why...do you hate me?
Shark: (sad shark noises)
Inaba's shoulders droop.
MC: Inaba, can you tell me something?
Inaba: Huh? O-oh, you should pull a White Rabbit Mikuji and--oh no, right they're dark and unreadable!
MC: Forget whether he hates you or about the fortune sticks. You know how you feel, right? What do you want to do?
Inaba: ...oh! Yes, my new master! I mean, Master! I still want to talk to him, even if he does hate me, so I should charge in!
MC: Right, let's go guys!
Ebisu, Hotei, and Benten: ...MC.
Benten: Know what? You're right!
Ebisu: It'll be weird if we got the wrong person, but if we can see Daikoku again...!
Hotei: We still haven't seen some o' the other old crew either yet, either. What kinda performer gives up here?
Benten: What kind of Lucky Gods would we be if we let luck get away from us on New Year's!?
Inaba: Master...please let me help you! That man is Master Onamuji, the man I wanted to see again after so long! So please...!
Shark: (urgent shark noises)
MC: We're going after Daikoku, Inaba! And we're fixing the fortune sticks!
Ebisu, Hotei, and Benten: Yeah!
Inaba: I came all this way to see you again, Master!
Daikoku: ...uh? W-what's going on with my body!?
End of Episode
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