Sunday, October 16, 2022

Akiba and Dragons Episode 5 Part 1 (Abridged)

There are many secrets in the world, which in turn necessitates cyphers. Human history in turn is a cycle of struggle between those who would reveal these secrets and those who would hide them.
Tindalos: Reveal the dirty laundry!
Enigma: Hide crimes!
What is he saying?

Tindalos: It feels GREAT getting it all out! Take that weight off your shoulders!
Enigma: Secrets are treasures, a wish of something you keep dear. Hide it within yourself, deep where no one can see it.
No really, what is he saying?

Enigma: Secrets are the societal boundaries between yourself and others. You must not publicize them or show them to anyone else.
Tindalos: Don't you want to show who you really are? Show them everything!
Error
Tindalos: Secrets are the differences between yourself and others born within you. They're too heavy to hold by yourself.
Enigma: Don't you want to keep them for yourself? Full disclosure is not the end all, be all.
What
Enigma/Tindalos: Seclude [Expose] your secrets.
Tindalos: Tell everyone. That's my theory.
Enigma: Tell no one. That's my theory.
Definition: Unclear. Building consensus...building consensus...
Click

Tindalos Bro: Conclusion drawn. Beginning task.

Present
Kuniyoshi: Furry Stan SERVE!
Catoblepas: I-I got it! Uhh, here? (bonk) OW!
Zhurong: Yeees, more pictures!
Vapula: WHY ARE WE PLAYING VABEACH VOLLEYBALL
Creators: BECAUSE!
Vapula: They didn't even need to think on that!
Kuniyoshi: Come on, we're at the beach. Doing stuff will make great manga references!
Hecate: Yeah, weird how being in a virtual world makes me want to try it out even though I'd hard pass in reality.
Catoblepas: Thank you for inviting me...also, we need a change of pace at times like this. Okay, ball's in your court Vapula!
Vapula: wait what AAAAHH
Vapula: I'll get you for this! Vapula Smash!
Vapula sucks at volleyball so the ball veers off elsewhere. The sand dragon runs off to pick it up.

Sand Dragon: Bark bark!

MC: Ooh, nice toss! Harem Protagonist Smash!
Kuniyoshi: Oh no, MC is on the other side!
Catoblepas: It's okay, I've brought reinforcements for this situation.
Akiha Gongen: Oh! Oh! He's talking about me! Put me in coach! Bump that ball for me!
Catoblepas: O-okay, here goes!
Akiha: Firefighter Smash!
MC: Oh no! Vapula, you good?
Vapula: R-right. If I'm vaplaying, I'm in it to win it! And, uhh...
Sand Dragon: Bark bark!
Vapula: ! Okay, here we go!
Zhurong: Good luck everybody!
Babe Bunyan: Zhurong, stop taking pictures and join in!
Zhurong: Oh! You're right, Babe.

Later
Itzamna: Hmm. It's good to have experiences like this from time to time after locking up in our studios. Would everyone like to take a break? Our delivery from the dining area has come!
Creator: HOORAY!
Tons of food is laid out on picnic blankets.

Itzamna: Oh my! This food looks more like art than mere cooking.
Hecate: It's the Akihabara Metaverse School collaboration menu. Everything's a special based on famous students.
Kuniyoshi: Well let's look and eat. I'm hungry after all that moving around.
Zhurong: Wait, pictures first!

Akiha Gongen: I'll split it up then. Anything you guys want specifically?
MC: Refreshing Black Soda / Mixed Taste Changing Soba / wait what the hell is Mystery Fried Tindalos
(A) Babe Bunyan: Holy shit that soda's good!
Zhurong: It looks so bubbly but the taste is so unexpected! It's great!
Hecate: An unapproachable appearance but actually a clear and nice taste inside? Reminds me of someone...
Catoblepas: Ooh, I think I know who it's based on.
(B) Kuniyoshi: This just looks like a mix of three kinds of noodles...
Hecate: Hey the pasta's actually yakisoba. Surprising!
Akiha: And this part that looks like ramen is soba noodles! So many different spices!
(C) Vapula: Way to vaplay it straight with the name...
Itzamna: It says the idea is based on exposing secrets? It looks like regular takoyaki.
Vapula: Hey, there's no octopus at all! There's cheese and sausages vaput inside though!
Itzamna: I found apples and custard. Very creative!

PA System: Paging Vapula and MC Fullname to the manager's area!
MC: Huh?
Vapula: Oh! It's time for Tindalos's vaprototype test! Let's go!
Vapula quickly runs off...then immediately comes back.

Vapula: I almost forgot! Thanks for the food!
Vapula runs off again. MC follows along this time.

Hecate: Hey, hasn't Vapula changed?
Kuniyoshi: Well he's a hasty guy. Also my name is Pot now.
Akiha Gongen: Hmm...it feels like he's looking at his surroundings more.
Catoblepas: ...we're past the halfway point of the event, but I hope Vapula figures out what feels means to him.
Itzamna: Okay, we have things to do once lunch is done. Lots of visitors coming, I hear, so do your best everyone.
Creators: Okay!
Everyone runs off.

Sand Dragon: Chirp? (stares off into the distance)

Later
Vapula: Hey, we're here! How's the vapreparations going?
Tindalos, Turing, and Enigma are here with Tindalos Bros' body.

MC: This is kinda exciting / Another collab? / Technology and art fusion, huh?
Turing: Yep. Of course I'd know about an autonomous thinking robot AI Transient with a personality. We humans don't get a chance to make something like that every millenium! This could be my final invention as a human too. Nothing ominous there!
Enigma: Beginning activation sequence, proceeding through checklist.
Tindalos: Screw the list! Down with convention!
Enigma: Objection. Cutting edge technology must proceed with caution. I have been paying careful attention to the system construction and added a failsafe function over your emulated personality. My specs are nothing special, but I have made the best system I could.
Tindalos: Humblebragging! That doesn't fit you! How can you live so constrained with rules for rules' sake!? What is even the point!? Then again that's why I go around saying you should put everything out in the open.
Enigma: I must ask you the same. What do you secure with that freedom? Our students' social statuses and economy function due to present day society. If its order and secrets are torn apart, all would descend into chaos as people hurt one another. There would be no culture, no art, much less Youtubers. Protecting the freedom you howl so much about is the true nature of the societal rules you claim to hate.
Enigma and Tindalos: >:C

MC: Stop! / Let's focus on the project! / Philosophize later
Tindalos: Ugh, FIIINE. I'll leave you in charge for now, Enigma.
Enigma: Understood. I apologize for picking such a trivial fight.
Vapula: ...t-they really vapulled back out of the fight. I don't like those loud aggressive fights... I mean we're gonna vaput something cool together. We oughta smile!
Turing: (stares femboyishly)
Enigma: Vapula, please set up the body. I will monitor the interior.
Tindalos: What am I supposed to do? Just stand there?
Enigma: Think of something for the mental pattern readers to pick up on.
Tindalos: That's all you have to tell me!? You want something from the darkest parts of my mind!?

The three get to their positions to do things, so MC walks over to the spectator section with Turing, who stands there smiling.
MC: Truly the face of pure evil / So which side are you on? / Ayyyy, when's your next day off?
(A) Turing: Oh, do I have my plotting face on? ...it was for a lark because I'm evil like that. What are you going to do about it? Chide me? Rebuke me? Or...become a joint researcher with me? ...Kidding! I'm not planning anything. Anything evil, at least.
(B) Turing: Are you referring to their argument? That was just a matter of mental gymnastics. Debating order and chaos is a time honored tradition of affirming the society you belong to. Infrastructure is something people tend to forget about, so those debates become necessary. But let's just say society will collapse no matter which I support. Not that I think old school ways collapsing is bad~.
(C) Turing: ...how novel. Is this flirting? I know about it intellectually, at least. My schedule is very flexible, but it'd take some shifting things around even for you. Could you call Enigma later?

Tindalos Bro is being worked on.
Enigma: Forming pseudonerves...
The body starts breathing.

Tindalos: Yeeeah, come on Bro!
It's the creation of a new life, even if it is a copy of someone else!

Turing: !!
Tindalos Bro: ...
Enigma, Vapula, and Tindalos: ...WE DID IT!
Later
The special stage area is filled with tons of people. Part of them are Tindalos fans waving glowsticks. Everyone else is just expecting a good time.

Kuniyoshi: I really wasn't expecting Tindalos to put an event on all of a sudden.
Hecate: Yeah, and in reality instead of online. It's trending on the net.
Zhurong: Hmm. Maybe a famous Youtuber could be a good news topic.
Babe Bunyan: Yeeeah, trailblazing by genre busting! I should see how the net does things for when I become a farmer one day!

Backstage, there's a sigh of relief at seeing how excited everyone is.
Vapula: I guess we can relax after all we vaput in making that vapiece of work. All those power cables and magnetic fluids holding all the sand together and stuff.
Enigma: You did well on that, Vapula.
Vapula: Well yeah! I can re-vaproduce anything written in a book!
MC: Are you not gonna make a physical body, Enigma? / So cutting edge, huh? / Enigma's swimsuit, yeeees
(A) Enigma: A body for interacting with the physical world? Frankly, it is unnecessary. I am already in a server, and bodily functions do not present any advantages as a tradeoff for less computational ability... We could touch one another? Would you like me to add pressure sensors to your VR headset? ...it'd be pointless if it were one-sided? Understood, I will recalculate based on your irrational desire.
(B) Enigma: I will refrain to some extent on answering that question, but there are no problems with the individual technology. The magnetic fluid came from Kamata while the sand was given to us by civil engineers. The organic assembly is our original work, however. Hmm? I seem proud of it? Well I am just answering what was asked of me...actually, I suppose I should be saying you are correct.
(C) Enigma: Biorhythm change detected in MC. I see, so you are inclined to that. This design was made to suit people of certain tastes. You want to know what I think of your opinion? Your ogling is the height of incompetence, which I deem very much worth supporting.

Suddenly music starts! The glowstick waving fans look at the big screen monitor, at which point Tindalos gets on.
Tindalos: Hey everybody! It's ya ears and brains' boyfriend! It's the Tindalos--
Audience: Channel!
Kuniyoshi: Oh my god there's this many of Tindalos's followers here!?
Hecate: Well it was trending on the net. Maybe that's why there's more people here than expected?
Zhurong: But he's still on a monitor when he said he'd show up in reality.
Babe Bunyan: Oh man, the flame wars that'd start if he doesn't deliver.
Tindalos: Ayyyy, you can't rush these big shows like that baby.
Babe: Hey f0ck YOU, man! I-I totally knew that!
Tindalos: Yeees, just like that! Okay Bro, it's showtime! Come on out, TINDALOS BRO!
Tindalos Bro comes out.
End of Episode half

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