It all started on a summer's day with a scrap of paper...
Ashigara: Career consultation?
Avarga: Yep, yer the only one left who hasn't done it yet. Gonna go pro, go to college, go find work? You could totally go college sumo too. Jus' need to hear what plans you got, in person or on paper. Undecided? Cuz we could--
Ashigara: Uhhh, just waiting on it okay thanks bye!
Avarga: Where ya runnin'!?
Ashigara (narrating): And then I crumpled the paper into my bag and pretended it didn't exist.
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: Wait, you don't want to graduate?
Ashigara: I dun wanna leave y'all!
Kyuma: That tracks, but who'd let that happen?
Gunzo: Um, I hope someone does I guess?
Durga: This is the part where you're supposed to slap him back to reality, stupid. I get it since we'll be there in two years, but still.
Ashigara: But I'm supposed to go in less than one! We gotta say goodbye anyways!?
Kyuma: S-sorta? Not like it has to be goodbye forever.
Gunzo: Yeah, our other senpais decided already so--
Ashigara: All I hear is that all y'all are leavin' me! All our friendship moments, gone forever! WAAAAAH
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: (help)
Ashigara (narrating): Nobody understands meeee. And then, at sumo practice...
Ref: There!
Ashigara: (GASP!) THAT'S IT! OUTTA MY WAY BOYS!
Present
Ashigara: And that's how I decided to just repeat school at Yoyogi. Then I joined the treasure hunt and dragged Gunzo along, but then he got put on the other team! Waaaaah!
MC: aww, poor baby / reminds me of another senpai / stop being a baby
---
(A) Ashigara: MC, you understand~!
(B) Ashigara: Oh my god, some bishie at Shinjuku is hanging back too? So you understand, MC?
(C) Ashigara: Waaaah, I thought you'd understand~!
---
It's been several days since sailing off. So far so good, so motive sharing time.
Sitri: I'm thinking about my future too, but I'm stuck on where to go. Decision paralysis! And my relatives are staring, judging! Anyways, I thought I'd figure something out if I came and brought at least one person along. Sorry I got you in like this, MC-senpai, but I feel a little better knowing Ashigara-senpai's in the same metaphorical boat!
Volkh: Deliberately choosing to be alone. I guess Kamui might understand that. And at Setagaya, if sumo is all you're good at we'd suggest you keep going that way.
Ashigara: Might as well! I'm gonna hang back in school, no matter what!
Volkh: I guess these things happen sometimes.
Sitri: So why'd you join, Volkh?
Volkh: As I told MC, I am here to find treasure and personnel totally out of my own volition. Never has Lord Perun ordered me to go on this trip. Never, or may the heavens strike me down!
MC: bit too corporate wage slave there / gee, whose idea could it beeee / you're like Kamui that way
---
(A) Volkh: Indeed! Unlike Kamui, I'll never tell!
(B) Volkh: What!? I am nothing like Kamui! As a noble and officiant, I will lie without hesitation!
(C) Volkh: Stop looking at me like that! I am totally here for personal reasons and not factional ones!
---
Sitri: Oh...well, I wanna go find treasure together with you! So Hermes, what business brings you here?
Hermes: Oh we can be casual as a short term group up. I'm just here because I'm bored. Not like I have a home or anything.
MC: Yeah, you do like wandering / he's totally up to something / (I know what you are)
(A) Hermes: Yep. Singularity cruise paid for by Toyosu? Sign me up, dude!
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(B) Hermes: Aren't we all? That said, I'm just here for the cruise. Let's just get along, 'cause that's where the money goes.
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(C) Hermes's eyes say "shut up."
Sitri: okay wow, the mood's dying. Also I feel like you're hiding something.
Sitri: Oh well, whatever. Alberich, what's your--wait where is he?
Alberich: ...BOO
Sitri: AAAAAA
Ashigara: Where'd you come from!?
Alberich: Haha, I must have done this before! Wizardry, sailing, treasure guarding, and then stuff I probably didn't want to do! But I do think I am a fairy king, maybe! My ring artifact gives me invisibility magic! So I am always watching, peasants!
Volkh: Oh, a similar artifact to mine in equipment style.
Alberich: The gold calls to me! So work for me!
Hermes: You DO know this is supposed to be a for fun thing, right? Whatever treasure here can't be that special.
Hermes goes to lean on the mast and starts playing his flute.
Alberich: Ooh! Hermes, I name you ship musician!
Ashigara: (gasp!) Wait, does that make you like, music captain? Cool music! Let's dance, Alberich!
Volkh: ...music was originally tied to ceremonies and labor. It has many functions on a pirate ship too. That said, impressive performance...
Pretty music. Sitri sidles up to MC and whispers.
Sitri: ...Hermes kinda sus. He keeps insisting this is just a game and pushes people away. You know him, right? Is he cool?
MC: Yep / dunno / ooh, sharp
(A) Sitri: Oh. Is my Intuition off then? I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(B) Sitri: You're making things sound worse! I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(C) Sitri: Oh. Welp. My artifact being what it is made me quick to see cagey types. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
Sitri listens to the music and relaxes.
Sitri: Well I guess I'd look sus to him. Sure he's putting some distance, but with music that good of course we'd take interest in him. Though maybe the music would attract other things too? But this is real life so--!?
Something just bumped into the ship!
Sitri: WHAT
There are grappling hooks stuck to the ship now!
Purple: S'up, strangers. This is our turf.
Ashigara: Oh my god, real pirates!
Alberich: Hermes, this is so your fault!
Hermes: Split personality, much!?
Purple: What's with you dicks? You put that flag up, you're saying you want a fight!
Red: Yeah, it means surrender or die!
Alberich: Take it up with Aegir! Does it look like I'd know that? For that matter, do we even look like pirates you uncultured swines!?
Rest of Party and Mobs: YES???
MC: yep, can't argue there / It's a misunderstanding! / this is Aegir and Alberich's fault
Purple: Okay so I was gonna ignore the Aegir bit because he's a pain in the ass, but anyways, fight time!
Red and Blue: Aye captain!
Sitri: Oh no, what do we do!?
Volkh: Calm down and get behind me!
Alberich: Hmm, time to work together like Aegir said? Then as captain...all hands on deck, boys!
Volkh: (stares) We're already here! Anyways, Ashigara! MC! We shall take the front lines!
MC: Yes, sir!
Ashigara: Right, I'll slap them all into sea!
Battle positions!
Volkh: Here me rakes! I, Volkh Vseslav lead this formation! Comrades, let us scatter these pirates as our first campaign!
BATTLE START (more happens after)
Volkh: Slavic Slash!
Ashigara: Sumo Thrust!
Volkh and Ashigara are sweeping the pirates!
Red: We outnumber them but they're kicking our asses!
Blue: W-what if we try taking the weak scrubs hosta--
Red: (bapped) BWAH
Hermes: Heeeey, so like did you guys think I was weak too? Oh whoops, he fell off. Oh well.
Hermes fills the gaps with hand chops!
Sitri: Oh my god, everyone's so cool! I mean I beat up some pirates too but still! I'm so far behind...
Purple sneaks up on Sitri!
Sitri: OH NO
Purple takes Sitri hostage!
Purple: Nobody move or the kitty gets it!
Volkh: No! He managed to blindside us!
Purple: Now down on your knees and--
Alberich: Yoo-hoo, sneak attack! Alberich Flying Kick!
Purple: Wait what!?
Purple manages to dodge as Alberich smashes the deck!
Alberich: (gasp!) How dare you evade my sweet moves!
Hermes: What did you expect by yelling as you attacked!?
MC: True, but now he's open!
MC hits Purple's knees and frees Sitri!
Volkh: Well done MC! Now leave, pirate-wannabes!
Glaring Volkh.
Volkh: Now surrender or we'll feed you to the fishes.
Pirates: (running) AAAAAA WE'RE SORRYYYYYY
Later
Sitri: ...thanks guys. And sorry I dragged everyone down.
Volkh: It's okay. You did well for a newbie and I let my guard down against them. And Alberich... you had a good idea but messed up with the war cry.
Alberich: (gasp!) Excuse you, how dare you accuse a noble like me of underhanded tactics!
Hermes: You? Noble?
Ashigara: Who cares, I didn't think we'd see real pirates! What if the other team got attacked too!?
Hmm...
MC: (think of Ikutoshi) / (think of Gunzo) / (think of Tetsugyuu) / (think of Motosumi)
(A) Ikutoshi: Huh. Did Aegir put you guys up to this?
Green: A-Aegir? Don't think you can scare us by--
Ikutoshi: Oh, so you're real. Cool, I don't have to be nice then.
Gunzo: Why are you so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(B) Gunzo: I can't believe we found pirates in an ocean singularity!
Green: You put up a pirate flag and fall apart at seeing pirates?
Gunzo: I mean, wouldn't normal people--why's everyone else so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(C) Tetsugyuu: Cool, real pirates to fight!
Green: I got a whole ship crew against you four, dick.
Tetsugyuu: That makes it even better!
Gunzo: I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(D) Motosumi: Damn this sudden but inevitable development!
Green: What kinda response is that to meeting real pirates!?
Motosumi: What kinda bitch ass Umamichi punk pisses himself at pirates? Now catch these hands, asshole!
Gunzo: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE
Welp, that's one panicky jock and three street fighters off kicking ass.
Ikutoshi: Eh, you should be fine Gunzo. You're well built and might have a knack for fighting.
Tetsugyuu: Yeah! Let's cut them all down!
Motosumi: Yep! Man up, Gunzo!
Gunzo: HELP
Meanwhile someone watches both teams from above.
Sanat Kumara: Okay, both teams got attacked but defended themselves well. Now leave the Singularity and tell the client Aegir.
click
Sanat Kumara: Well, Singularity dimension levels makes outside contact harder, but it should be fine with me around. But it's hard to stand back and watch. Yet I must, since an impenetrable wall from the past stands before you all.
Back in Tokyo
Aegir: Cool. Go back and wait for me to call again.
Aegir dumps his phone and has a drink. Dagon stares at him.
Aegir: Okay it's been days inside and both teams had a little trouble.
Dagon: Trouble you caused?
Aegir: It's cool, I got someone watchin'. I'm not putting all my cards down for this, but I got something standin' nearby if it goes to shit.
Dagon: FYI I will totally use Foreigner Teleport if an emergency happens.
Aegir: Aww, you worried?
Dagon: Don't lie, you're the same when MC is involved.
Aegir snorts.
Aegir: ...hey, wanna make a bet on which team wins?
Dagon: Heh. Sounds like a fool's wager.
Aegir: Why's that?
Dagon: Because I don't know much of anyone involved. My world ends with me.
Aegir: Cool. That doesn't stop you from betting.
Dagon: You're just saying whatever.
Aegir: Listen up, here's how I'll do it.
Aegir whispers. Dagon thinks.
Dagon: Okay, fair enough. I bet on MC's team. You?
Aegir answers, Dagon shrugs. Two glasses clink as the bet is made, and Dagon talks to himself.
Dagon: Heh, gambling on competing students is the height of decadence. He's just making excuses for who the bet is for. But now I have an excuse to throw in some support. Impress me, MC.
End of episode part
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