Bael: ...your seat. This is the Bael Special☆Demon's Love.
Astaroth is pleased. Bael is very displeased.
Astaroth: Oh cheer up, Bael! How about a toast of this...Bael Special whatsit?
Bael: Don't repeat it! ugggggh this is why I never said anything to you, "Master" Astaroth.
Astaroth ordered the bar's most expensive bottle.
Astaroth: Sorry I came without telling you, but you'd never have said a word if I didn't, would you?
Bael: No. How'd you even know I was here?
Astaroth: You underestimate things a lot. I know how to do research too, you know. So when does the customer service part start?
Astaroth holds up a glass. Bael gives up and plays along.
Bael: Ahem. Thank you for choosing me, cherie. Careful, this devil's after your heart.
Astaroth: Wow! You could be number one anywhere.
Bael: Happy now? Please leave yesterday.
Astaroth: Hey, don't ruin the mood so quick!
Bael: ...why are you even here?
Astaroth: Not to tease if that's what you're worried about. I We came to cheer you on.
More of the Ars Goetia demons show up!
Sitri: I got peer pressured into coming...
Bathym: Hey BaeBae, pour one out for me! Sorry if I steal all your customers!
Vapula: It's vaparticularly busy here I see. And the interior setup is--oh wait never mind.
Amduscias: I'm here again!
Bael: but why tho, I don't even want to be number one host. Door's that way, thank you.
The demons are confused.
Astaroth: Bael do you have sunstroke?
Bael: What, you think I want to be number one in EVERYTHING?
The demons are vibing.
Bael: When I say I want to be number one, I want to be number one in absolute power! Not some trifling bar host! And you think I would stoop to calling you all for help?
Bathym: Aww...oh well, wanna check the place out, Sitri?
Vapula: Aww, but I vaprepared so hard for this!
Astaroth: Bael, wait please!
Oh look who else is here.
Michael: I heard Big Brother is here! I'm going to help him better than anyone else pretending to be his family!
Later
Amaterasu, Michael, and Fuxi are sitting together.
MC: hELP??? / What would you like to drink?
Amaterasu, Michael, and Fuxi: One of your best bottles.
Cat: Right away!
Lots of cheering! Except for the Cold War going on at the table.
Amaterasu, Michael, and Fuxi: ...sibling-in-law.
MC: Oh god couldn't you guys come on different days? / WELP / Thank you very much☆
Amaterasu, Michael, and Fuxi: >:C
Fuxi: SIIIISTER! Make it two bottles!
Micheal: BIG BROOOOTHER! Three bottles!
Amaterasu: F-four bottles then! Mommy Big Sis will help you!
MC: But the price tag?? / Nooo don't fight over me~ / Thanks, love ya☆
Amaterasu: Is this what you and Smoky God do for socializing? It's okay, I know my finances.
Fuxi: Hmm, he's been gone since the staff called him away. It's okay, I won't flout the rules.
Michael: You'll always be my number one!
Amaterasu and Fuxi: NO ME
Meanwhile
The Ars Goetia demons are watching MC and Michael.
Bael: Change of plans. Help me out as your boss!
Bathym: Uh okay but why the change of heart?
Bael: Isn't it obvious? We're putting that bratty little angel in his place! MC is OUR number one, not his and not anyone else's!
Amduscias: are you telling us to fight him or something
Bael: No, make ME today's number one host. We will beat MC and the World Reps!
Astaroth: Now that's the Bael I know!
Bael: Astaroth, battle plans!
The Ars Goetia demons smile at seeing Bael back to normal.
Sitri: So like, don't base your plans on my wing feathers, okay?
Astaroth: I know. We have our own way of doing things. Vapula?
Vapula: Got it! I'm so glad my vapreparations aren't going to waste!
And so the Ars Goetia demons leave the bar for a bit.
Later
Three more Baels!
Bael: EXCUSE ME? Are these your golems, Vapula!?
Astaroth: Correct! You like corrupting people one on one, but there's still only one of you, right? So what if there was more of you? Look, we made them and they'll be just like you! Okay, serve me "Bael."
Bael Golem 1 starts acting like Bael.
Bael G1: Understood. I swear upon my soul to love you, cherie. Now kiss--
Vapula: NOOO why did he do that!?
Bael: ...and how was he like me? (pinches cheeks)
Astaroth: Ow! Please, what's wrong with a little originality?
Bael: So there's more than portrayal infringement to talk about! But seriously how'd you manage to make so many clones and clothes for them so fast?
Bael: (thinks) ...oh right. Amduscias was here yesterday.
The Bael golems blow off their suits down to swimsuits!
Bael: WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS!? ...okay fine, maybe it'll help me be number one today. But first, quality check!
Bael goes up to a golem.
Bael G1: You make me want to kill myself for yo--(punched)
Bael G2: I wuv you so mu--(punched)
Bael G3: STEP ON ME MA CHERI--(punched)
Vapula: Noooo, my babies! Baeby Daddy what are you doing!?
Bael: SHUT UP. Who even programed these things!?
Vapula, Astaroth, and Amduscias look away and whistle.
Vapula: Maybe I shouldn't have vaprogrammed them with doujin lines.
Amduscias: I thought fans like that these days...
Bael: ...okay fine, I'm not very host-like, whatever. Vapula, fix their damned programming. It can even just be how I normally am.
Bael quickly fixes up the golems.
Bathym: So what do we even do?
Vapula: Eh, just watch them after I vaput them under your commands.
Bael: ...wait there's only three of them, though.
Vapula: Oh right I forgot to mention! I made 48, so I'll vaput 12 of them to each person! The vaplan was originally 72, but resource issues.
Bael: Were you trying to go to war or something?
Astaroth: Well in your case, that wouldn't have to be entirely wrong.
Later
Cat: Your drink towers!
Champagne pyramids get put up!
MC: omg / For me? Ooh~ / Eeee ♡
Fuxi: So, how's your wallet doing?
The World Reps are playing poker. Or maybe it's just metaphorical.
Michael: Pfft, running out of steam already?
Amaterasu: MC, let's drink my order together.
The temp staff parts ways as Bael struts up!
Bael: Excuse me. I've come to declare war, MC!
MC: WHAT / but why tho / bold move
Michael: Bael? You think you can win?
Bael: Indeed. Behold!
Bael golems walk up and pose!
MC: WHAT / did you go off the deep end? / Gimme one!
(A) Bael: Surprised? Winning's not so crazy a dream now, eh?
(B) Bael: Please don't ask. I can be formidable if I flout the rules of war!
(C) Bael: ...no, get one yourself.
Bael: Do it!
...
Astaroth: Bael 1, pour me a drink. Bael 2, feed me fruit please.
Bael: HELP ME OR GO HOME!
Astaroth: Sorry, I didn't think this could happen again so I just started doing in without thinking... Oh, but everything should be going to plan.
Elsewhere
So many Bael golems!
Y'golonac: OH MY GOD Bael are you a ninja or sum shit!?
Perun: Interesting! Give me one to use!
Bael G1: Bold of you when I WE are going to be number one today.
Suddenly!
Bathym: Hey you guys, sudden special event now! Wondering who I am? Details!
Sitri: Kind of important detail, yeah. Not every day some rando starts yelling at you.
Bathym: ...oh fine, let's just say I'm a friend of the devil host.
Bael golems go "Not really!"
Bathym: Well he's my rival as the number one top familiar of this one lord, but I do sympathize with him in admiring the number one. So anyways, we're doing a "Guess the Real Bael" game! Get tipping, get your wishes granted!
The customers start getting hyped over getting wishes granted by a demon!
Amduscias: Wow. It's okay people, there's still a lot of the BEL48!
Barong: Whoa, you're here again Amduscias?
Amduscias: Senpai! Sorry, I'm here for Bael today...
Barong: It's cool!
Amduscias thinks about how he admires Barong and how Barong is never jealous or negative. Amduscias starts getting negative...
Amduscias: Come at us, bro!
Barong seems a little surprised but smiles. Customers are asking for Bael!
Bael Golem: Now now, no need to rush.
Michael: I see. You seem a little different.
Fuxi: Heh. Pull whatever trick you want, it won't work on us World Reps.
Amaterasu: A bigger champagne tower please!
Y'golonac: (walks over) Okay hol' up a sec. Y'all can pay, right?
Fuxi: Of course! I--oh.
Fuxi has no money left on him. Neither does Michael and Amaterasu.
Y'golonac: Y'all never checked the price list, huh? We ain't doin' tabs today so...
Y'golonac kicks out the World Reps!
Fuxi: How DARE you discount my Golden Rule! I can win all the money for my SIIIISTER!
Amaterasu: Bad luck for us, I suppose. I can't believe Smoky God has the advantage here!
Michael: Fine, I'll just come back another day!
MC: Welp / Nooo, my sales!
Bael Golem: Heh, I'm going to win today!
Ose: Don't expect Smoky God to save you today, I just sent him back. And now I'm here, fashionably late.
MC: Oh god you're all against me! / Yay, Ose!
---
(C) Ose: Hey, I wanted to see you too. I didn't think I'd be able to make it in time after stopping Smoky God.
---
Bael Golem: Well done, especially since normal methods shouldn't work on him.
Ose: Yeah, I tried. It didn't. But somehow talking did, and he gave me a message for MC. It says "I'll see you again at the Night Pool."
Bael Golem: I win! Now, why don't you pick me, MC? My real self will legit grant you your wishes. It's me, I'm the real self.
MC: YES PLEASE! / You look like him, but Bael isn't this open.
(A) Ose: Whoa you're easy. A real devil's gonna catch you one day.
Bael Golem: Shut up, Ose!
(BC) Bael Golem: Ha, you know me so well!
Ose: Bael, go talk to someone else. I'll take care of MC...I mean, you can be my host, right MC?
Bael Golem: No, MC's mine. (snaps fingers)
Bael Golems surround MC!
MC: Oh no! / Omg yes!
The Bael Golems put MC in a nice chair and get ready to serve!
Bael G1: Can you actually figure which one is real? I'm curious about that. Also I lied about being the real Bael.
Bael G2: No wait, I'm real.
Bael G3: I got you fruit, MC. Say ahh?
MC: Ahh / wait hold up what???
Ose: Wait, you guys were supposed to handle other customers so--
Bael suddenly attacks! Ose Matrix-dodges and frowns!
Ose: Bael what the hell man
Vapula: NOOOO Baels 5, 8, and 13, you're supposed to stay vaput!
Vapula gets bitchslapped by Bael Golems!
Vapula: OW
Ose: Vapula what the hell is happening?
Vapula: I-I dunno! I just vaprogrammed them like Bael told me to!
The customers think this is some show. For now.
Bael G1: I made you a drink, Master MC.
Bael G2: I'll rub your feet and hold them tight, okay?
Ose: Okay this is getting problematic. You DID program them right, yeah?
Vapula: Tee hee, I vaprogrammed Bael 21 to be a little yandere. So that's how that worked.
Ose: You're on your own when Bael starts kicking your ass.
Astaroth: Wait, maybe you do need a little roguishness to serve customers.
MC: what? / help??? / this is fine!
---
(C) Ose: Maybe we should leave MC alone if they're fine?
Astaroth: But that would ruin the plan!
---
Astaroth: So maybe making the Bael Golems more open backfired...
Vapula: Maybe the AI chip we got from Turing and vaput in is part of the cause?
Ose: So you tried taking the tsun out of tsundere? Huh.
Astaroth: We have to fix this!
Vapula: B-but how? Vaput the golems out of order?
Astaroth: We'll have to try reprogramming them again! Ose, get the others!
BATTLE START
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