Meanwhile, at Akihabara Academy...
Tindalos: What the fuck is a Multilayer Overworld Shift Phenomenon?
Turing: I'm not sure how to dumb that down for you any further, love. It is a phenomenon when multiple overworld shifts happen all at once at the same place layered atop one another. Do you understand the worlds coming out of my mouth?
Tindalos: And how's that any different from all those other overworld shifts happening? Old news!
Turing: It's on a higher order of scale love, keep up now. Like right now, I'm pretty certain Mt. Hakone has at least 30 levels of singularity mind dungeons.
Tindalos: HOLY SHIT WHAT
Turing: And still counting! Would be quite an issue if they spread off the mountain too. Doesn't that sound like fun?
Tindalos: Turing what the shit man!? I don't NEED the world getting more dimensions! 2D is plenty enough for me!
Turing: Oh yes, right. I can't make it through the day without afternoon tea with a side of gentlemanly snark.
Tindalos: Meh, why the hell are bonfire videos popping off these days? People seem bored of me tryna blow up the net with hot takes.
Turing: Sounds like a hint to change gears from the internet to me!
Tindalos: Pffft, who do you think I am? I'm proud of doing my streams my way so...
Turing: Yes?
Tindalos: PLEASE HELP MEEEE
Turing: Oh! Well in that case I've sent some help to investigate. A specialist you know and barely tolerate.
Tindalos: Why didn't you say so!? I was 'bout to smash my head on the screen begging!
Turing: I'll keep Akihabara shipshape, so I sent our best base defender and comms expert. They should be at Shinjuku by now, I can't wait to see what tea he'll pour as they say these days!
Shinjuku Academy front gate
???: Arrived at destination as planned. My schedule is perfect, as it should be. Also what is all that noise?
Wandervogel Club
Club: Yaaaay!
Chernobog: Mmm... (munch munch)
Bigfoot: Taste like succotash from home!
Zao: Seconds please!
Durga: Me too!
Tanngrisnir: Ahh, the appetite of youth. Yes, there's plenty more! Plenty indeed!
Enigma walks in.
Enigma: ...President Santa, what is happening here?
White: A stew party. Would you like to join, electron child?
Enigma: Is everyone feeling ill or the like? Extremely incompetent?
White: Now now, a big appetite is good. I've been expecting you, Enigma.
Enigma: ...so you know the situation. Very well, I shall test out this body.
Later
Wandervogel Club: Event plot!?
Enigma: Oh. You decided to eat first instead of do exposition? Okay, I might as well try using my new body to give you the information directly.
MC: Why ARE you here, Enigma? / Hmm, that body... / The stew was too good...
---
(A) Enigma: Yes I am here as your cyber secretary, Master Incompetent.
(B) Enigma: It was made to help with emergencies. I can support you even in the physical world now.
(C) Enigma: Such inefficient fueling methods, Master Grazer.
---
White: Well we should introduce ourselves to new faces. I'm Ded, Santa Claus.
Tanngrisnir: And I'm Tanngrisnir!
Bigfoot: Oh. You famous!
Enigma: I am Enigma, Akihabara student. The Creators guildmaster sent me to help investigate the event plot, and I can do anything if necessary to cover for your incompetence.
Durga: RUUUUDE
Zao: ...so why is Santa and an e-secretary here? We aren't that bad in either sense...?
MC: Senpai is naughty / We do have an incompetent club president / Yeah, Senpai's good and competent!
(AB) Zao: !?
(C) Zao: :)
Later
Wandervogel Club: Event plot!?
Enigma: why are we doing this again
White: I'm sure you all know about Mt. Hakone.
Zao: Yes, it's our home mountain.
Durga: Mt. Hakone is weeeeird. Something about it connected to Santa's mountain?
Tanngrisnir: Indeed. Have you heard of Korvatunturi? General faith says Santa can fly and therefore fly over mountains. And some of us in Tokyo are Santas, so maybe some of the overworld shifts are from our home world. Anyways we were contracted to investigate and do some Santa training and care at the same time, so--
MC: That's the event plot...? / so mountains are popular right now? / is that relevant to us somehow...?
(C) Enigma: Aww, so confused. What a cute meatbag.
Durga: So Enigma, why are you here?
Enigma: Investigation work since my Master wants to get news ahead of everyone else. Mt. Hakone seems normal on the surface, but insufficient information is making predictions impossible. Thus, we seek more information for the Akihabara Defense Plan and--
Zao: what
Frowning Wandervogel Club.
Enigma: (stares)
Enigma: I apologize. I have underestimated the amount of dumbing down that would be required of me.
Durga: RUUUUDE
Chernobog: Now now, let us grasp the situation first before deciding anything. Fair enough?
Enigma: I suppose so.
Later
MC: Okay so...
Chernobog: The event plot is a multilayered overworld shift happening with something unusual stemming from it.
Durga: But isn't like nothing happening right now? How is this even new?
Bigfoot: Surface, no effect. But maybe something happen later...
Zao: And that's why they need us to go check it out. We can see what's different.
Enigma: Indeed. Excellent summation of my shared intelligence.
Durga: Uppity jerk acting like you're better than us!
Enigma: Indeed. I am better than you.
Zao: Hmm...
MC: What's up? I'm surprised you aren't jumping all over this already.
Zao: Can I speak with the club in private?
Enigma, White, and Tanngrisnir agree and leave the room.
Durga: What's up, Zao? You're being weird.
Zao: Okay so, here me out... if we do this, this might be the last club thing I do this summer.
MC: Oh right, you'll be graduating soon / You actually went to extra classes!?
Zao: Right, I'll be retiring from the club then. I did want to answer right away and go to Mt. Hakone, but I couldn't bring myself to do it... I wasn't expecting us to go when I didn't plan for it.
MC: You don't want to do it? / It'll be a good time / We can always see each other outside the club
Zao: Of course I want to go! But then this would be the last time we all go as a club...
Bigfoot looks surprised. Chernobog and Durga frown.
Zao: ...I don't want to climb mountains for a living. I want to do it for fun. But MC's right I would have gone no matter what, the way I was before. I do want to go, but that isn't enough for this. We barely have enough gear and no money!
...
Wandervogel Club: Zao.
Zao: W-what?
MC: Since this is your last time, do what you want and we'll come with you.
Zao: Kouhai... (looks at everyone else)
Chernobog: I respect you. I will always be with the club.
Durga: Let's do it!
Bigfoot: Me, new guy. Me, follow. But personal opinion...me want to climb mountain with everyone.
Zao: Guys... (turns back to MC)
MC: Let's go to Mt. Hakone and see what the hell is going on!
Zao: Right! Wandervogel Club, this summer we are going to solve an event plot in the mountains!
Durga: Awesome! Let's do that one thing!
MC: Uhh, oh! Right!
Wandervogel Club: Wandervogel Cheer!
Hallway
White: I think they've decided. Oh such nice children.
Tanngrisnir: I'll join as their advisor.
Enigma: Really...?
Tanngrisnir: Oh right, Enigma! Sorry we ran out of stew earlier, but I remembered I still have some backup in--
Enigma: No thank you, cyber bears don't need to eat. But please stay away from me.
Tanngrisnir: E-Enigma?
Enigma: I have a report to make, see you when we make the trip out. (leaves)
Tanngrisnir: O-okay cool...well he didn't have to be that cold.
That night, Setagaya
Snep Girl: So, work with Shinjuku's Wandervogel club? The club mommy knew this would happen~! So, what do?
Himavat: Accept it of course. It's not like I do mountain climbing for fun, Xi Wang Mu.
Krampus: Okay cool. Good luck on the mountain.
Himavat: I promise to do the best investigation.
Krampus: O-okay?
Yule: We'll be going now. Take care up there, kthnxbaiii!
Himavat: It will be perfect as always. Also tell Santa we said hello.
Xi Wang Mu: Aww, so cool-headed! I'm having first world mommy problems not having anything to help you with.
Himavat: What? We are totally the best mountaineering group in Tokyo, no one will ever equal us, and we have to keep it that way.
Xi Wang Mu: Now now, no keeping secrets from mommy~! I saw when perked up when they mentioned Shinjuku's club.
Himavat: ...right. Also it's slightly funny no one calls you Seioubou despite how every other Chinese origin character gets treated. But yes, it's the cool mountaineering president who gets me worked up like no other, Zao Gongen!
Xi Wang Mu: excuse me did you just call him cool? Well anyways should I call the rest of our club? All two other people? Wipe off your head before you catch a cold! Okay back to the kitchen with me, bye~!
Himavat: I'll GET YOU THIS TIME ZAO
Some forest
Asterios: O-okay, that's this week's lot of charcoal lumber. There's the money and... see you next week. A-also, maybe clean up and bathe for once?
Much Less Ugly Yuno: Being dirty makes me relax like I've told you so many times already.
Asterios: I-I guess. Bye Kumano Gongen. (leaves)
Kumano: Damn, I finally get used to being alone and now summer club stuff is almost over. And I'm supposed to be next in line after President Superman? Oh well, charcoal work done for the day. Time to get ready to hike... oh no, my connection dropped again. Video uploading is hard, man.
Kumano: (stares)
Kumano: Can't I just be left alone? It's so much easier.
And somewhere in the distance, a temple bell rings.
End of Episode
No comments:
Post a Comment