Friday, April 7, 2023

Valentine Snow Fight Episode 6 (Abridged)

Hotel
Amduscias: So busy...but Gabriel is here! She so smol...I wish I were cute and smol like her, not a big lunkhead.
Barong: Sup new guy! Look alive!
Amduscias: Senpai! Please stop calling me new guy.
Barong: Wow you learn quick for someone who just started, New Guy. ANYWAYS, did everyone in the two guilds head out already?
Amduscias: Yeah.
Barong: Did you manage to sneak that note I gave you to the event organizers?
Amduscias: Yep...also I have a question.
Barong: Lemme guess: "is this work gonna help me become an idol?"
Amduscias: !!

Barong: You came to our talent agency portal since you wanted to be an idol, right?
Amduscias: C-could you keep that quiet, please?
Barong: You specialize in composing, performing with instruments, and acoustic directing, but you're wondering why nothing we assign you relates to that, huh?
Amduscias: N-no, well...I know I'm being pushy for a new guy. I got mad respect for you teaching me and for musically jiving with me. All those dance lessons and voice coaching! I just...wonder if I really can become an idol like this.
Barong: Oh, haha! Oh whoops I shouldn't be laughing. But everything in the entertainment world relies on backend prep work and we know that the most. Singing and dancing are important, but they aren't the most important things. Neither is your appearance. We gotta check our egos as Entertainers. Like you're still embarrassed about people finding out you wanna be an idol. That's proof you haven't let your ego go, and why I'll keep calling you New Guy.
Amduscias: ...what DOES entertaining people mean?
Barong: Well...Christine and our playwright Oscar will give you different answers, but I think it's making things exciting enough that people watching will say this is a good time to end things. And when that happens, I personally think it's fine if I wasn't any help at all on stage. (puts on mask)
Amduscias: You put your mask on! Just like when everyone else gets serious about their work and--
Barong: We're going into the last act, New Guy. On the job training showtime!

Game Field
PA System: Weather's cleared up, game's back on schedule! Last round, places everybody!
Shennong: We're starting the second you guys got back. You don't look hurt, but anything wrong?
Girimekhala: I'm all good! Thanks Shennong! I mean, Doc!
Shennong: No thank you for listening to me. Man, I wish SOME PEOPLE in my guild would come quick to my office when they get hurt. Anyways, you seem fine to participate...but tell me if you feel off at all.
Girimekhala: Okay. Time to trip over my two left feet!
Shennong: You what. Bleh, you are just like some of the other Missionaries. You fit right in.
Girimekhala: ...thanks. I'm a new guy though, so after this game I--
MC: Haha, Shennong nagged you / I'll try not to be too crazy out there / *(listen quietly)*
(A) Shennong: Don't think you're getting out of this! You go too crazy, and I will stab you with my syringe!
(B) Shennong: You do that. If you get hurt, it's a big fat shot and lecture time for you.

Girimekhala: ...I'm gonna trip, later and probably forever. I've been thinking about a lot of things after talking with Airavata. I always wanted to be someone who didn't trip...I felt like I had to be, or I couldn't look the people who were nice to me in the eyes. That I had to be helpful somehow to repay them. But I started thinking differently after meeting you, MC. I was part of the Asakusa Taoshis, and now I'm a Missionary. Both are me, and now I feel like I can sorta see an answer to my questions. So I wanna do everything I can! And that means I'm gonna trip SO HARD in this matchup!
MC: Break a leg!
Girimekhala: Yeah!
Andvari: Hey guys, looking good! We're on as planned, like the announcement says. Now MC, about your placement...you were on both teams and the team you were on won that round, right?
Tezcatlipoca: War involves luck sometimes, though your group placement meant little BRRRROTHER...
Andvari: Yeah, you're a strong one.
Tezcatlipoca: In this round, we want you to be on neither side.
MC: uhh...what? / I'M BEING FIRED!?
---
(C) Andvari: No, not that!
---
Andvari: We're gonna throw in a new rule involving you for this last game.
Tezcatlipoca: I'm certain a doctor I know brought this idea in...but we think it sounds great!

Later
Tiger Man: Testing, testing, 1-2-3... ¡Hola amigos! Show's back on, time for the final round of the Valentine Snow Fight!
Players: YEEEEAAAAHHHH
Tiger Man: Yeeessss, the cheers! I'm your host, Tiger Man, and for a brief recap: round one winners, the Warmongers! Round two winners, the Missionaries! And round three will be starting soon! Who's gonna win!? I'd send you all on your strategy meetings now, but we gots a new rule in play! This game's gonna be a flag battle. You'll still be out if you get hit and give points, but we got one player acting as the flag and give out a ton of points to whichever team gets them! Except getting them isn't shooting them with a snowball. You get them by giving chocolate!
Jacob: :)
Rest of Event Cast: !?
Tiger Man: We'll be giving three chocolates to the special leads soon, but anyone can hold onto them! Just give them to the flag! Go aggressive, pull sabotage, it's all good! Okay, strategy time!

Warmongers meeting area
Yoritomo: I shall now go over our plan. This may be a lot of chocolates to us, but we really only need one. The Missionaries will be planning to capture the flag, so focus fire on their main units, stall them, and capture the flag in the meantime. Tanetomo, you go get the flag. Take this chocolate.
Tanetomo: Yes Your Excellency.
Yoritomo: ...that is all. Now win.
Shennong: This is a pretty simple plan coming from you, Sir. Usually they're a lot more complicated.
Yoritomo: Our problem lies in how to handle Jacob...
Tanetomo: Well I have a plan. He's only ever done one thing so far, so let's send out decoys to mislead his love vision while I go capture the flag. The main thing is to keep it from helping, okay everyone?

Tezcatlipoca: BORING!
Yoritomo: Pardon me for disappointing you, but I do no wish to enjoy war. Victory is just setting things up, and once that's done I leave since there's nothing left to do. I did go up front in the second game, but this is what suits me.
Tezcatlipoca: Haha, you really think this will get you the win in the big picture?
Yoritomo: ...what are you saying, General?
Tezcatlipoca: Okay, it's true Jacob will charge for the flag solo himself. But it's about time for Olympus's Spare World Representative to show his stuff. He has the power to create bonds, and doesn't that sound conceptually advantageous against your style of keeping distance?
Yoritomo: (stares in paranoia)
Tezcatlipoca: And the flag is BRRRROTHER! You honestly think Tanetomo alone will be enough to catch them? Are you truly saying you don't want to approach BRRRROTHER?
Yoritomo: ...oh, is that why you made them the flag? Dick move.
Tezcatlipoca: HAHA, whoops I've been found out! Oh wait, you aren't going to RUN now, are you? You should at least take one of the chocolates with you. I can take the third one. Don't worry, it won't affect the game!
Yoritomo: >:(

Missionaries meeting area
Jacob: I shall deliver the chocolate of love!
Missionaries: ...
Arslan: Are you really committing to that plan?
Jacob: It is the only plan I am capable of planning. I joined this event because I wanted to share love through snowballs (and fists), but I have no way of knowing if they will reach. But I still wish to try! Straight Hook of Love, straight forward!
Shinya: Um, I'd like to join in with you on that plan. A frontal assault sounds fun, and I want to try things Missionary-style.
Maria: Did you have to put it that way

Zabaniya: But it's true! You're just like Jacob in how little you fear getting hurt, Lady Maria.
Arslan: You too, Zabaniya! You oughta learn some self-preservation.
Maria: Arslan, how long has it been since you DIDN'T get caught because you charged in solo?
Shinya: ...haha, you're all alike. I wanna join in and say I did everything I could.
Girimekhala: M-me too! ...but I'm just gonna get in the way again. But I still wanna try!
Jacob: Ahh, such love and determination. Together then, and take this chocolate.
Arslan: Ahaha! Welp!
Zabaniya: I will give all that I have to pave your way.
Girimekhala: ...alright, I gotta finish this proud!
Tiger Man (offscreen): Meeting time over! Come to the field, amigos!

Outside
Barong: A game's no fun if it's just split between the approachers and the keep aways, and that's why we need Entertainers. On that note, we're splitting up New Guy. Make the show awesome and I'll stop calling you that. Bye!
Amduscias: Wait, where are you going? And what am I supposed to do!?
Game field
Tiger Man: Okay guys, game time!
Players: YEEEEAAAAHHH
MC: whoa / I'll do my best! / I'm gonna have a blast!
Tiger Man: ¡Gracias! Time to get the show on the road then! 10! ...5! 4! 3! 2! 1! GO GO GO!

Jacob: All I need is to spread love! Now catch these hands!
Tiger Man: Yep, Jacob's first to move again!
Jacob: Lord I thank you for my participation in this game and getting so excited in such a long time. I swear to bring love to everyone('s faces) here!
Tanetomo: So predictable. Fire!
Yasuyori: Yes, Advisor!
Shennong: Sorry, you're stopping here!
Jacob: I saw this coming and yet I'm still surprised everyone's come!
Shinya: I-I can go all out too! Cupid!
Arslan: Now is our time! Rise, everyone!
Zabaniya: Full power!
Maria: I'm with everyone until the end too!
Azazel: Hehe, such foolish passion...so entertaining.
Tiger Man: Wow, both sides are bringing everyone to battle! Awesome!
Girimekhala: I-I can do this! I feel great! I! Can! Win! (trips) OH NO
Shinya: Girimekhala!
Elsewhere

Airavata: ...did you need something?
Barong: I came to entertain you!
End of Episode

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