Live A Hero Health Check Crisis Episode 3 (Abridged)

Flashback!
Rasalhague: Beep boop, 10,000th virtual examination completed. Algorithmn defect detected, requesting developer feedback.
Researcher A: Okay, tomorrow.
Rasalhague: Understood.
Researcher A: Damn, it's not even a week and Rasalhague's done so much.
Engineer B: Yeah, and so developed to take patient emotional state into account like a real person!
Medic C: Tronesion tech is amazing.
Rasalhague: ...
Rasalhague (narrating): I was created in a computer room and trained endlessly. First ship operation and maintenance, then medicine. Medicine wasn't originally part of the plan, but then I looked up a medical database while talking to the techs and they thought it'd be a good idea.
Medic C: Mkay, gotta turn in early. Can't oversleep on my day off with my kids.
Engineer B: Oh yeah, you're going on a family trip. Have fun!
Researcher A: God I wish I could go on my break already.
Rasalhague: "Break?" ...keyword found in search, no detailed entry.
Rasalhague (narrating): So many unknown concepts and nuances in language were still unknown to me. Like break. So I linked up to external networks to learn why. I don't know if that was a good idea still.

Title Card: You Fear Nothing, Don't You?

Present
???: Full body exercise!
???: Deep breathing!
???: HELP WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE
???: Relaxation techniques!
???: OH NO
Health zombie brainwashed heroes are chasing unbrainwashed people all over the Ophiucus 1! MC and Bygul keep running away until they find somewhere to sit down.
Bygul: okay it looks clear here... MC, you okay?
MC: yep / what about you? / tired...
(A) Bygul: Nice, guess people who get around train differently
(B) Bygul: I-I'm okay!
(C) Bygul: No surprise. But if we have to run, I can carry you!

Bygul: !! Someone's coming!
MC and Bygul check the hallway...
Red: Health guidance, health guidance!
Purple: HELP, PUT ME DOWN!
A wrestler with a blue collar and cuffs gets carried away by a wrestler with red collar and cuffs!
Bygul: ...okay they're gone. Wish we could've helped, but most everyone's a hero, and there's not supposed to be anything bad happening to them...right?
MC: oof / why's everything so crazy / is anyone sane around?
Bygul: Why's this happening? What's health guidance anyway?
MC: Can't be anything good. Is it what they're doing to whoever they grab?
Bygul: Dunno. Kinda scared to find out. I mean I try to be healthy even if my life is more indoors! I jog every day! What about you?
MC: Totally fine! / Guess I've been slacking off lately / unhealthy...
(A) Bygul: Yeah! Where do they get off with calling us unhealthy!?
(BC) Bygul: O-oh...

Bygul: WHY are they calling us unhealthy though?
Flashback!
Red: Blue collar? Unhealthy!?
Present
MC: Maybe the color of our collars?
Bygul: Oh wait, I do remember them yelling about that. But what's the standard for it though?
MC: Well we have to make a plan. We need help.
Bygul: R-right! Can you call anyone, MC? Preferably someone not on board!
MC: Umm...
MC checks their contacts. Ryekie's up first.
MC: I should call Justice!
ring ring
Ryekie: HEY MC, HOW'S THE MED EXAM!?
MC: Oh my god, quiet down! / my ears...
Ryekie: O-oh, sorry. I was just happy you called. Why are you calling, though? ...did something happen?
MC: Yeah! Okay so...

One explanation later
Ryekie: Excuse me, what???
MC: (shrug) / Whatever, we need help!
---
(AB) Ryekie: B-but anyways, I get you need help!
(C) Ryekie: R-right, that's the important thing!
---
Ryekie: Hang on, I'm--uckle--at the--
Connection dropping!
MC: Oh no!
Ryekie: ...!
Boop. Network connection lost.
MC: Damn! What was with the static though?
Bygul: Uh, are we getting help? Also, was that voice--
???: I heard something!
Red: (pops up) Health!
MC: OH NO
Bygul: We gotta go!
Bygul: (Okay I'm really worried about guarding MC alone and not getting any calls out, but I guess I have to!)

Later
Bygul: Did we lose him yet!?
MC and Bygul run around and end up at the lobby! They're about to hide when...
???: PUT ME DOWN, Y'ALL!
MC: Wait, that voice!
Furlong: It's okay Chief, you'll be healthy soon!
Rutilix: Potato nutrition facts!
Okitaka: Where y'all even takin' me!?
Furlong, Rutilix, and two randos are carrying Okitaka away somewhere!
MC: Okitaka! / Rutilix, Furlong!? / what
Bygul: wait you know all those people!? Are they crucifying him? I mean, they're taking him away!
MC: Help him! / Ugh, we gotta save him! / RIP Okitata
(AB) Bygul: Right!
(C) Bygul: How cold ARE you!?
Rutilix: Who's there!?
Bygul: Oops. Well since they found us anyways, let's save him!

Face off!
Furlong: MC, what's wrong? ...(gasp!) You're unhealthy!?
Rutilix: How terrible, Lord Sorceror! I was in the middle of looking for His Majesty since he hates vegetables! You need health guidance! And potatoes!
MC: Maybe we could reach Furlong if we had time? / Classic Rutilix / F in the chat, Your Majesty
---
(C) Bygul: Whomst? Is this an international incident now?
---
Okitaka: Help me, y'all!
Bygul: Oh right! Let him go!
Furlong: Chief needs guidance!
Rutilix: Yes, as do you two! Lay down your arms and surrender!
Bygul: WHY ARE YOU MAKING US SOUND LIKE CRIMINALS?
Rutilix: Give us Lord Sorceror and learn the virtues of the potato!
Bygul: Oh god he pulled out his sword! MC, transform me quick!
MC: Welp!

click
Bygul: Alright, come at me!
Rutilix: Oh. Very well then, CHARGE!
Furlong: Wait, slow down! Oh alright, you two hold the Chief! And give him stretches because he's been in the same posture for so long!
Red Trainee: Okay! Circulation!
Green Trainee: One of us! One of us!
Okitaka: OW WHAT
Okitaka is left hanging upside down as Furlong and Rutilix attack!
Bygul: Wait, 2v1!? AAAAAA
Rutilix uses Reckless Charge! Furlong uses Suppression Fire (Hose)! Bygul barely dodges!
Rutilix: What!? Do you not know how great potatoes are either!?
Furlong: No, we're trying to make them healthy, so hurting them is missing the point!
MC: A flash of sanity? Bygul, now!

Bygul: Right! Bygul Punch!
Rutilix: what--(punched)--OOF
Rutilix gets punched at the wall!
Furlong: Whoa. Are you saying no mercy? Then I'll go full power too!
Bygul: What!? Oh my god, calm down!
Trainee Red: I'm gonna help too! Gotta get those gains!
Okitaka: But I thought you two were supposed ta hang onto m--BWAH
Okitaka literally gets tossed aside!
Bygul: Oh no I'm even more outnumbered now! Also is that old man oka--AH!
Bygul gets attacked! No opening to fight back!
MC: Oh no!
Someone suddenly grabs MC from behind!
MC: OH NO
Rutilix: Fear not, Lord Sorcerer! I shall take care of you and never let you go!
MC: Let go actually! / I wanted that in other circumstances!

Rutilix: Now, this way Lord Sorc--(bonk)--AAAAAA
Rutilix gets knocked into a sofa and passes out! Then someone else holds MC!
Shidemasu: Hello, were you just about to be kidnapped?
MC: Shidemasu!
Bygul: That one guy! You're okay! And weirdly strong...
Shidemasu: I am just here to watch things, so I wasn't affected by the medical staff. But anyways this seems to be an emergency. Nobody is covered by my insurance, so who should I be helping? Except now I believe I think I know.
Shidemasu lets go of MC and steps forward.
Shidemasu: Will you temp contract me for the duration of this incident? I will be sure to keep you safe.
MC: You're a hero!? / Nice! / Please help!
(BC) Bygul: You're a hero too!?

Shidemasu: Oh, I didn't say? I'm with S&S Heroes. But as we are in a hurry, here is the contract.
beep boop contract signed
Shidemasu: Very well then, please transform me. It would be difficult to fight otherwise.
MC: Okay! I'm surprised you could manage anyways...
click! Hero Shidemasu!
Shidemasu: I am ready now.
MC: You're a long arm user!? / whoa / HOT
Trainee Green: New guy!? Well I'm not losing!
Trainee Red: Dental health!
Furlong: No mercy to anyone preventing health guidance!
Rutilix: Oof... I'll make you need potatoes as much as I do!
Shidemasu: Oh. Well this is convenient.
Shidemasu spins his staff and poses!
Shidemasu: Come. Any who threatens my charge will fly past the horizon.
Bygul: Are you ENJOYING this!? A-anywas, MC, we gotta fight!
Okitaka: y'all somebody please tell me what's happenin'
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Green Trainee: Aerobics is best done for at least 20 minutes!
Shidemasu: Thank you for sharing.
Shidemasu uses his staff to evade!
Green Trainee: Aah!
Shidemasu spins his evade into a knockout attack!
Red Trainee: Natto trivia!
Shidemasu: I don't like natto. Now please stop moving too.
Red Trainee: OOF! Tofu protein... (flop)
Down!
Shidemasu: Huh, how many has it been?
Shidemasu has a coughing fit before looking like usual.
Bygul: Uh, you okay?
Shidemasu: My apologies for worrying you. You're doing excellently for a newbie. But I will continue my duties for as long as the threat remains.
Shidemasu keeps smiling as he looks at Furlong and Rutilix.
Shidemasu: Oh, are we still going then?
Rutilix: WHAT ARE YOU
Furlong: You're scary! Scarier than medical exam results!
MC: holy crap what / Rutilix's knees are shaking / Furlong actually seems normal again

Bygul: You're a freak!
Shidemasu: Okitaka, do you need help?
Okitaka: N-nah I'm good. But get me outta here gently if ya please? Those are still my subordinates, even if they're done crazy.
Shidemasu: ...understood.
Shidemasu pulls Okitaka up. MC regroups with the party.
Shidemasu: Now, we'd best go before pursuers arrive.
Rutilix: W-wait, stop! Ugh, my legs!
Furlong: C-Chief! Please don't...
Shidemasu: We are leaving, okay? :)
Furlong: y-yes please don't hurt me
Bygul: Oh my god???
The party leaves.
Okitaka: Furlong...

Later
Okitaka: Oh. So the whole ship lost their marbles.
The party is hiding in some storeroom and catching Okitaka up to speed.
Okitaka: I DID think these collar things seemed weirdly tough for how simple they are. This ain't where I thought I'd be when I woke up today.
MC: So are they causing all this?
Okitaka: Just a theory tho. Maybe if we could talk to someone more involved? But there seems way to many red collar folks for that to explain things. How many crazy people are there?
Shidemasu: The reports say 13% based on device tracking.
Okitaka: Oh, so maybe these doohickeys do have mind control tech built in. Can we call up the computer controllin' them?
Shidemasu: Not at present. I've called Rasalhague multiple times to no response. I've called my office, but it doesn't seem to be a remote hacking. Then jamming came on and I lost contact with them.
MC: Oh yeah my call to Ryekie got jammed too maybe
Bygul: B-but you still got a call out? Maybe help is coming.
Shidemasu: ...unlikely. I was informed the ship is deploying an electromagnetic barrier. Any ships making contact might crash.
Okitaka: Oof.
Shidemasu: That said, the Ophiucus 1 seems to be in neutral airspace.
MC: So we're on our own?
Shidemasu: My agency and the Self Defense Force are trying to disable the barrier, but it seems difficult. Everyone's agencies should be convening for emergency countermeasures.

Meanwhile on a train to Nagoya
Gammei: Okay, what nonsense did I get called to this time?
Huckle: Something that's starting to concern the local police? You seem to know a lot of prefectural police people.
Gammei: So same shit, different day? And yeah I know people in Aichi and Mie. Also, aren't you worried about your own agency members being caught in this?
Huckle: Oh I am, especially as I don't know what's happening. But they're alive, and I doubt a medship incident would hurt people... And Okitaka is there.
Gammei: You sure trust him a lot. Sure he acts dumb, but he's sharp as they come.
Huckle: You'd actually describe your commander that way? You fear nothing, don't you?
Gammei: Well I trust him too. He's buying me drinks when this is done.
Huckle: ...you could be doing so much better than your current position.
Gammei: SHUT UP I JUST NEVER TOOK THE PROMOTION EXAM

Medship
Okitaka: Well Ichi and Gammei are outside, so...they prolly got a handle on things. We oughta figure out how to disable the barrier from inside.
Bygul: Oh, oh! I think checking Rasalhague's the fastest way to do that!
MC: Same. I mean, what else could we do?
Okitaka: ...nah, we don't have enough forces for that. Also, it'd be better to start fights... there's emergency escape pods, right? Maybe we can hack the systems to use those...?
Shidemasu: Wait, I have a manual... You are correct on all counts. Oh, using the pods also temporarily gives access to the ship's defense systems.
Okitaka: Okay, we got an out! Let's head there and try to keep callin' for help. If that don't work, we help whoever's in here and build up our ranks!
MC: Nice! / is this gonna work?
---
(C) Okitaka: Ain't like we got any better ideas. Let's just try it.
---
Okitaka: Lemme handle strategic planning. It's my UEHA job and all.
Bygul: Oh right, who are you really Okitaka?
Okitaka: Oh I didn't tell ya? UEHA Vice Commander Tadatono Okitaka. Pleased to meet ya!
Bygul: WHAT
Meanwhile, Main Computer Room
Rasalhague: Soon... Soon...
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Episode 1 Part 2 (Abridged)

Volkh: Your artifact gives you Invisibility AND Monstrous Strength?
Alberich: I know, sweet deal isn't it? I can take 12 men with this! Maybe! Okay maybe not. But I still become Super Alberich!
Volkh: Interesting. The invisibility bonuses are wasted when you yell like you did though.
Hermes: (That power combo sounds OP. Also sounds like it should be nerfed, so that's probably not its actual nature. Just gotta keep watch.)
Alberich: Fun fact, I can share Invisibility if I touch someone!
Ashigara: Oh my god really!?
MC: Make me invisible too! / Ooh, tactical options / Invisibility best power
(A) Alberich: Well if we keep going, it might happen, like, sometime. Alright dear! Just kiss my feet later and we'll make magic happen!
(B) Volkh: Indeed... if Captain Loudmouth could ever shut up.
(C) Hermes: ...well damn I can tell what you're thinking about. How do you keep clean with all that drool?

Sitri: I-it's a cool power, but sneaking with Invisibility isn't that badass though! ...but it's still more combat oriented than my Charm and Persuasion ability. Not really a sweeper's tool...
Alberich: That reminds me... did I ever make love potions? Ohohoho, I must have with pansies! Oh, the scandals I must have caused, maybe!
Volkh: A love potion with pansies!? Same as what Hippolytus did?
Sitri: Scandals, huh? I guess I've caused an incident like that...
MC: I think I remember that? I forget / (put a hand on Volkh's shoulder) / (put a hand on Sitri's shoulder)
(A) Sitri: So you were around for both those things, MC-senpai? Do you make these things happen!? But yeah, I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance one isn't badass!
(B) Volkh: Ow, one of my old scars!
Sitri: Wow... But yeah, I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance one isn't badass!
(C) Sitri: S-stop looking at me like that. I'm better at controlling my power since back then, but yeah I wish I had a combat artifact! A romance artifact isn't badass!

Alberich: I agree! Money and power is better than love!
Sitri: Wait, that's not what I was getting at...
Ashigara: I wish I had your power, Sitri! Popularity on demand!
Sitri: A big strong dude like you is a playboy too!?
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Hermes: I mean, sure love causes problems in a world ruled by love. Happens all the time in Olympus. But Alberich, why'd you make a love potion if you care about money more?
Alberich: Hmm...why indeed? Well whatever! Everything I said is true, maybe!
Hermes: Uh-huh. You caring about the gold here seems legit at least.
Volkh: On another note, what power do you have Hermes? I need to know for battle planning, like how MC has Severance and Ashigara has Restoration.
Hermes: Tee hee, details on yours first.
Volkh: W-what?
Hermes signals MC to keep quiet, then hums and changes the topic.
Hermes: Hey, I think we're close to the island on our map.
Ashigara: What? How can you tell if you never looked at it?
Hermes: We got birds flying around.

Later
Ashigara: Oh my god this beach is AWESOME!
Pretty beach.
Sitri: I can't believe Ashigara acts like a big boy...
Ashigara: Let's have fun Sitri! Forget about everything else!
Sitri: ...okay fine. N-not like I wanted to play on the beach or anything, baka.
Later
Sitri: OH MY GOD THE WATER'S SO CLEAR
Sitri and Ashigara are playing in the water! Alberich, Volkh, and MC are lying down on lounge chairs.
Alberich: The sea is beautiful, but salt water? Super gross on my skin. Also I can't reach my back to put on sunscreen to protect my luscious silky skin!
Volkh: I question laying back like this during a race, but I don't actually care that much about the treasure either. But this is much more relaxing than Kitezh's freezing cold. Cold drinks are great, but the sea breeze makes my fur stiff.
MC: (help Alberich) / (brush Volkh)
(A) Alberich: Well aren't you considerate for a peasant, dear? Alright, put your hands everywhere!
(B) Volkh: WHAT? ...alright I shall allow this, and not because you are good with your hands. A-ahem, you may touch my tail as well. Definitely not because your brushing feels good.

Alberich: Ahh, what a beautiful summer day! Just like me, maybe! ...wait, why are those mermaids calling me ugly? Ugh, they must not have eyes... ah! AAH! Flashbacks of questionable origins!
Suddenly Hermes comes back.
Hermes: I guess you DO have muddled memories. They're weirdly contradictory but somehow you don't seem to be lying. Oh well whatever, I'll just chill doing whatever.
MC: join us / pretty chill for someone after the treasure / (sus)
---
(A) Hermes: Sure.
(B) Hermes: Eh, I only care about it as much as you do. But for now, sea breeze!
(C) Hermes: What? Let's just sit here and enjoy the sea breeze.
---
Hermes: Good things come to those who wait, right? Not like we have leads, so we may as well wait for something to happen.
Hermes lies down. Sitri and Ashigara walk over.
Alberich: Mm, chill. Maybe I should smoke a pipe like Ahab!
Sitri: Hey, no smoking! Especially around minors!
Ashigara: Yeah!

Suddenly yelling!
???: DID SOMEONE SAY SUMO KING
Ashigara: (GASP!) That familiar voice!
Surprised party!
Yasuyori and Takeminakata are here!
Yasuyori and Takeminakata: Assassin Group 1 here!
Ashigara: WHAT
Hermes: Hey look something happened.
MC: Takeminakata! / Yasuyori! / Assassins? What?
(A) Takeminakata: MC! Today I am a beach boy instead of a city boy. I'd be both but I'm covered in sweat...
Yasuyori: I apologize for only being in fundoshi. I had something more summery but then picked something better for beach training...
Awkward duo.
Yasuyori: Ahem, Lord Aegir sent us to be assassins!
(B) Yasuyori: Hello Lord MC! Fitting summer wear you have. I apologize, my own summer wear got too sweaty...
Takeminakata: Same! Too bad it's hard to have something fashionable and summery for long...
Awkward duo.
Yasuyori: Ahem, Lord Aegir sent us to be assassins.
(C) Takeminakata: That's what Lord Aegir said, right Yasuyori?
Yasuyori: Indeed, we're here on his orders.

Yasuyori: We decided on our paths and signed on a summer job contract with Toyosu.
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Takeminakata: Yasuyori invited me along. Wow, now that I decided on my path I have so much time.
Ashigara: (GASP!)
Takeminakata: Then we got distracted training and didn't notice you here at first.
Yasuyori: Yes. I'm a little tired, but I'm warmed up!
Volkh: ...let's back up a moment. Aegir never mentioned anything like this to us.
Yasuyori: Oh! Lord Aegir stationed assassins like us along your treasure hunt paths!
Takeminakata: And if you beat us, we'll give you a hint on where to go!
Yasuyori: Also Lord Aegir let us set up our own challenges.
MC: welp
Yasuyori: And so we challenge you to beach sumo! But with a special rule in place!
Volkh: Which is?
Takeminakata: It'll be a 2v2 sumo match right here! Last one standing wins title of Sumo King!
Sitri: is that an actual sumo title?
Alberich: I see! As king, I shall witness this contest!
Yasuyori: If I may, I'll designate your participants: Ashigara and MC.
MC: Okay! / please go easy / but I'm the only sumo rookie involved!
Ashigara: How DARE you guys choose to leave me behind. See how resolved I am to stay back in school!
Yasuyori: excuse me?
Takeminakata: I dunno.
Yasuyori and Takeminakata: Oh well. Fight us!
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Ashigara, Yasuyori, and Takeminakata: AAAAAA
Lots of body slamming!
Sitri: Wow... wait, we have to cheer on Senpai and Ashigara!
Ashigara: I'm staying back a year and nobody's gonna stop me!
Volkh: Such leg strength! All of them would be worth inviting to Setagaya. Too bad they've already decided on where to go, but at least it isn't Toyosu.
Alberich: Ohohoho, so this is sumo!
Hermes: Not really??? ...I'm glad I don't have to be in there. I coulda used Reversal to win it, but being in there is beyond dangerous!
MC: BITCH I'M ALREADY IN HERE / (too busy surviving to yell)

MC looks for an opening! Ashigara goes all in on a frontal assault!
Takeminakata: Oh no, Ashigara is pushing us back by himself now!
Yasuyori: Is that really his plan!?
Ashigara sees an opening!
Ashigara: SUMO THRUST!
Double ring out!
Ashigara: Whoo... ya see that!?
MC: OH NO GET OUT OF THE WAY
Ashigara: wait what? Oof! ...oh.
Ashigara gets pushed out the ring by MC's charge!
Sitri: A pushout from behind!?
Alberich: Oh, is it over? Ahem, I now pronounce MC the Beach Sumo King!
Ashigara: (GAAAASP!)
First set of assassins defeated! Ashigara goes to be depressed by the water.

Ashigara: I can't believe I got thrown out by a pushout from behind...
The other sumo wrestlers come to talk.
Yasuyori: Well done, Ashigara.
Takeminakata: Agreed!
Ashigara: I only won because you two were tired...
Takeminakata: I don't understand why you're all sad, but I'm looking forward to next time! Maybe our paths will cross again and we'll be teammates again.
Ashigara: wait...
Takeminakata: Yeah, maybe we'll find new friends next match!
Ashigara: Takeminakata... I...
Yasuyori: Ever since I entered Yoyogi, I believe the present matters for us all. And I hope you might start thinking so too one day.
Ashigara: Yasuyori...
MC: Yasuyori's right / it's still sad! / I'm on your side, Ashigara!

Ashigara: MC... so the present matters because I joined Yoyogi...
Ashigara thinks. Volkh puts a hand on his shoulder.
Volkh: Ashigara, you have your own path. You would be welcome in Setagaya if you wish to join! But you may think all you like about where you want to go.
Alberich: If you're that good, why not climb to more fabulous stages?
Hermes: Blunt, yet true.
Sitri: I'm lost in life too, but if I was as strong as you I think I could be confident and move forward. My worries are kinda different, but I still kinda wish I had your problems. But then, I'm not you and dunno what you're thinking.
Yasuyori: Hmm, makes sense. Well, we may separate for a bit but we'll be stronger next time we meet. I had fun together, and I'll always remember it. If you continue on the path of sumo, I'm sure we'll meet again. And I'm sure Gunzo and Kyuma think the same.
Ashigara: ...WAAAAAH! I'm so happy! But also so SAAAAD!
MC: (pat on head) / (smile) / (cry even harder)
Ashigara: Waaaah!
Hermes: Welp, that's done with.
Volkh: Yes, but it took some time. Perhaps we should settle for the night.
Sitri: But assassins though. Think the other team had some too?

MC thinks of the other team...
MC: (think of Ikutoshi) / (think of Gunzo) / (think of Tetsugyuu) / (think of Motosumi)
Rewind!
---
(A) Ikutoshi: Cool, some real training. Come at me.
Gunzo: Why is this happening!?
(B) Gunzo: Why is this happening!?
(C) Tetsugyuu: So many pirates! Too bad Boss isn't here, but this will be fun!
Gunzo: No it won't! Why is this happening!?
(D) Motosumi: What? More goddamn pirates? Well at least y'all look less shit than the last crew!
Gunzo: That isn't good! Why is this happening!?
---
Gunzo: First Ashigara-senpai and MC are on the other team, now this!? AND THEN WE HAVE TO FIGHT A BUNCH OF GIRLS!?
Suzuka: Are you being sexist right now!?
Ibaraki: And I ain't no girl, asshole! I mean, ohohoho! It's payday for the Outlaws!
Gunzo: AAAAAA
Tetsugyuu: Wow, I'm actually up against Sis Suzuka.
Suzuka: What the hell are you saying, you idiot!?
Ibaraki: Yeah! You joined the treasure hunt as a regular civvie when you heard MC would be in so we got hired as assassins instead! ...or so Ibaraki told me!
Ikutoshi: wait what
Motosumi: Wait, Tetsugyuu. You knew they'd be coming?
Tetsugyuu: Yeah. Didn't you guys?
Rest of Team B: NO???
Tetsugyuu: oh

Later
Ashigara: OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD
Dinner time! Dinner's fancier tonight to help make Ashigara feel better.
Sitri: Yeah! Hermes, your lobster paella's especially great!
Volkh: The ingredient quality is high, but also you seem to be talented at cooking.
Hermes: Lotsa camp experience. And one of my recent jobs has me in the kitchen sometimes.
Alberich: Oh honey, this roast is fabulously luxurious! Just like a pirate! Hermes, play something!
Hermes: Crack that whip harder, why don'tcha? But sure, later.
Takeminakata: Is it really okay for us to join for dinner?
Ashigara: I want you guys here! Maybe I'll make some special seafood stew too... too bad Gunzo's on the other team and Kyuma's at a tournament.
MC: you have no chill, but I get the feeling
Yasuyori: Ashigara, let's all spend time together when we get back. Can't go wasting it on regrets.
Ashigara: I-I know! I've at least decided not to waste the present!
Happy party.
Ashigara: I'll remember everything that happens tonight!
And so the night of pleasantry goes on. A bittersweet sadness remains, but Ashigara laughs as he commits the experience to memory.
End of Episode 

Afterschool Treasure Odyssey Episode 1 Part 1 (Abridged)

It all started on a summer's day with a scrap of paper...
Ashigara: Career consultation?
Avarga: Yep, yer the only one left who hasn't done it yet. Gonna go pro, go to college, go find work? You could totally go college sumo too. Jus' need to hear what plans you got, in person or on paper. Undecided? Cuz we could--
Ashigara: Uhhh, just waiting on it okay thanks bye!
Avarga: Where ya runnin'!?
Ashigara (narrating): And then I crumpled the paper into my bag and pretended it didn't exist.
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: Wait, you don't want to graduate?
Ashigara: I dun wanna leave y'all!
Kyuma: That tracks, but who'd let that happen?
Gunzo: Um, I hope someone does I guess?
Durga: This is the part where you're supposed to slap him back to reality, stupid. I get it since we'll be there in two years, but still.
Ashigara: But I'm supposed to go in less than one! We gotta say goodbye anyways!?
Kyuma: S-sorta? Not like it has to be goodbye forever.
Gunzo: Yeah, our other senpais decided already so--
Ashigara: All I hear is that all y'all are leavin' me! All our friendship moments, gone forever! WAAAAAH
Durga, Gunzo, and Kyuma: (help)
Ashigara (narrating): Nobody understands meeee. And then, at sumo practice...
Ref: There!
Ashigara: (GASP!) THAT'S IT! OUTTA MY WAY BOYS!

Present
Ashigara: And that's how I decided to just repeat school at Yoyogi. Then I joined the treasure hunt and dragged Gunzo along, but then he got put on the other team! Waaaaah!
MC: aww, poor baby / reminds me of another senpai / stop being a baby
---
(A) Ashigara: MC, you understand~!
(B) Ashigara: Oh my god, some bishie at Shinjuku is hanging back too? So you understand, MC?
(C) Ashigara: Waaaah, I thought you'd understand~!
---
It's been several days since sailing off. So far so good, so motive sharing time.
Sitri: I'm thinking about my future too, but I'm stuck on where to go. Decision paralysis! And my relatives are staring, judging! Anyways, I thought I'd figure something out if I came and brought at least one person along. Sorry I got you in like this, MC-senpai, but I feel a little better knowing Ashigara-senpai's in the same metaphorical boat!
Volkh: Deliberately choosing to be alone. I guess Kamui might understand that. And at Setagaya, if sumo is all you're good at we'd suggest you keep going that way.
Ashigara: Might as well! I'm gonna hang back in school, no matter what!
Volkh: I guess these things happen sometimes.

Sitri: So why'd you join, Volkh?
Volkh: As I told MC, I am here to find treasure and personnel totally out of my own volition. Never has Lord Perun ordered me to go on this trip. Never, or may the heavens strike me down!
MC: bit too corporate wage slave there / gee, whose idea could it beeee / you're like Kamui that way
---
(A) Volkh: Indeed! Unlike Kamui, I'll never tell!
(B) Volkh: What!? I am nothing like Kamui! As a noble and officiant, I will lie without hesitation!
(C) Volkh: Stop looking at me like that! I am totally here for personal reasons and not factional ones!
---
Sitri: Oh...well, I wanna go find treasure together with you! So Hermes, what business brings you here?
Hermes: Oh we can be casual as a short term group up. I'm just here because I'm bored. Not like I have a home or anything.
MC: Yeah, you do like wandering / he's totally up to something / (I know what you are)
(A) Hermes: Yep. Singularity cruise paid for by Toyosu? Sign me up, dude!
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(B) Hermes: Aren't we all? That said, I'm just here for the cruise. Let's just get along, 'cause that's where the money goes.
Sitri: um, okay? I feel like you're hiding something.
(C) Hermes's eyes say "shut up."
Sitri: okay wow, the mood's dying. Also I feel like you're hiding something.

Sitri: Oh well, whatever. Alberich, what's your--wait where is he?
Alberich: ...BOO
Sitri: AAAAAA
Ashigara: Where'd you come from!?
Alberich: Haha, I must have done this before! Wizardry, sailing, treasure guarding, and then stuff I probably didn't want to do! But I do think I am a fairy king, maybe! My ring artifact gives me invisibility magic! So I am always watching, peasants!
Volkh: Oh, a similar artifact to mine in equipment style.
Alberich: The gold calls to me! So work for me!
Hermes: You DO know this is supposed to be a for fun thing, right? Whatever treasure here can't be that special.
Hermes goes to lean on the mast and starts playing his flute.
Alberich: Ooh! Hermes, I name you ship musician!
Ashigara: (gasp!) Wait, does that make you like, music captain? Cool music! Let's dance, Alberich!
Volkh: ...music was originally tied to ceremonies and labor. It has many functions on a pirate ship too. That said, impressive performance...
Pretty music. Sitri sidles up to MC and whispers.
Sitri: ...Hermes kinda sus. He keeps insisting this is just a game and pushes people away. You know him, right? Is he cool?
MC: Yep / dunno / ooh, sharp
(A) Sitri: Oh. Is my Intuition off then? I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(B) Sitri: You're making things sound worse! I mean, I've always been quick to pick out the cagey ones. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!
(C) Sitri: Oh. Welp. My artifact being what it is made me quick to see cagey types. Makes me want to use my artifact to Charm him into opening up!

Sitri listens to the music and relaxes.
Sitri: Well I guess I'd look sus to him. Sure he's putting some distance, but with music that good of course we'd take interest in him. Though maybe the music would attract other things too? But this is real life so--!?
Something just bumped into the ship!
Sitri: WHAT
There are grappling hooks stuck to the ship now!
Purple: S'up, strangers. This is our turf.
Ashigara: Oh my god, real pirates!
Alberich: Hermes, this is so your fault!
Hermes: Split personality, much!?
Purple: What's with you dicks? You put that flag up, you're saying you want a fight!
Red: Yeah, it means surrender or die!
Alberich: Take it up with Aegir! Does it look like I'd know that? For that matter, do we even look like pirates you uncultured swines!?
Rest of Party and Mobs: YES???
MC: yep, can't argue there / It's a misunderstanding! / this is Aegir and Alberich's fault

Purple: Okay so I was gonna ignore the Aegir bit because he's a pain in the ass, but anyways, fight time!
Red and Blue: Aye captain!
Sitri: Oh no, what do we do!?
Volkh: Calm down and get behind me!
Alberich: Hmm, time to work together like Aegir said? Then as captain...all hands on deck, boys!
Volkh: (stares) We're already here! Anyways, Ashigara! MC! We shall take the front lines!
MC: Yes, sir!
Ashigara: Right, I'll slap them all into sea! 
Battle positions!
Volkh: Here me rakes! I, Volkh Vseslav lead this formation! Comrades, let us scatter these pirates as our first campaign!
BATTLE START (more happens after)

Volkh: Slavic Slash!
Ashigara: Sumo Thrust!
Volkh and Ashigara are sweeping the pirates!
Red: We outnumber them but they're kicking our asses!
Blue: W-what if we try taking the weak scrubs hosta--
Red: (bapped) BWAH
Hermes: Heeeey, so like did you guys think I was weak too? Oh whoops, he fell off. Oh well.
Hermes fills the gaps with hand chops!
Sitri: Oh my god, everyone's so cool! I mean I beat up some pirates too but still! I'm so far behind...
Purple sneaks up on Sitri!
Sitri: OH NO
Purple takes Sitri hostage!
Purple: Nobody move or the kitty gets it!

Volkh: No! He managed to blindside us!
Purple: Now down on your knees and--
Alberich: Yoo-hoo, sneak attack! Alberich Flying Kick!
Purple: Wait what!?
Purple manages to dodge as Alberich smashes the deck!
Alberich: (gasp!) How dare you evade my sweet moves!
Hermes: What did you expect by yelling as you attacked!?
MC: True, but now he's open!
MC hits Purple's knees and frees Sitri!
Volkh: Well done MC! Now leave, pirate-wannabes!
Glaring Volkh.
Volkh: Now surrender or we'll feed you to the fishes.
Pirates: (running) AAAAAA WE'RE SORRYYYYYY

Later
Sitri: ...thanks guys. And sorry I dragged everyone down.
Volkh: It's okay. You did well for a newbie and I let my guard down against them. And Alberich... you had a good idea but messed up with the war cry.
Alberich: (gasp!) Excuse you, how dare you accuse a noble like me of underhanded tactics!
Hermes: You? Noble?
Ashigara: Who cares, I didn't think we'd see real pirates! What if the other team got attacked too!?
Hmm...
MC: (think of Ikutoshi) / (think of Gunzo) / (think of Tetsugyuu) / (think of Motosumi)
(A) Ikutoshi: Huh. Did Aegir put you guys up to this?
Green: A-Aegir? Don't think you can scare us by--
Ikutoshi: Oh, so you're real. Cool, I don't have to be nice then.
Gunzo: Why are you so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(B) Gunzo: I can't believe we found pirates in an ocean singularity!
Green: You put up a pirate flag and fall apart at seeing pirates?
Gunzo: I mean, wouldn't normal people--why's everyone else so calm!? I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(C) Tetsugyuu: Cool, real pirates to fight!
Green: I got a whole ship crew against you four, dick.
Tetsugyuu: That makes it even better!
Gunzo: I'm just a jock, not a fighter!
(D) Motosumi: Damn this sudden but inevitable development!
Green: What kinda response is that to meeting real pirates!?
Motosumi: What kinda bitch ass Umamichi punk pisses himself at pirates? Now catch these hands, asshole!
Gunzo: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE

Welp, that's one panicky jock and three street fighters off kicking ass.
Ikutoshi: Eh, you should be fine Gunzo. You're well built and might have a knack for fighting.
Tetsugyuu: Yeah! Let's cut them all down!
Motosumi: Yep! Man up, Gunzo!
Gunzo: HELP
Meanwhile someone watches both teams from above.
Sanat Kumara: Okay, both teams got attacked but defended themselves well. Now leave the Singularity and tell the client Aegir.
click
Sanat Kumara: Well, Singularity dimension levels makes outside contact harder, but it should be fine with me around. But it's hard to stand back and watch. Yet I must, since an impenetrable wall from the past stands before you all.

Back in Tokyo
Aegir: Cool. Go back and wait for me to call again.
Aegir dumps his phone and has a drink. Dagon stares at him.
Aegir: Okay it's been days inside and both teams had a little trouble.
Dagon: Trouble you caused?
Aegir: It's cool, I got someone watchin'. I'm not putting all my cards down for this, but I got something standin' nearby if it goes to shit.
Dagon: FYI I will totally use Foreigner Teleport if an emergency happens.
Aegir: Aww, you worried?
Dagon: Don't lie, you're the same when MC is involved.
Aegir snorts.
Aegir: ...hey, wanna make a bet on which team wins?
Dagon: Heh. Sounds like a fool's wager.
Aegir: Why's that?
Dagon: Because I don't know much of anyone involved. My world ends with me.
Aegir: Cool. That doesn't stop you from betting.
Dagon: You're just saying whatever.
Aegir: Listen up, here's how I'll do it.
Aegir whispers. Dagon thinks.
Dagon: Okay, fair enough. I bet on MC's team. You?
Aegir answers, Dagon shrugs. Two glasses clink as the bet is made, and Dagon talks to himself.
Dagon: Heh, gambling on competing students is the height of decadence. He's just making excuses for who the bet is for. But now I have an excuse to throw in some support. Impress me, MC.
End of episode part